


War of the Beasts

by Theawester



Series: The Chronicles of the Diana [1]
Category: Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types
Genre: Complete, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, F/M, Falling In Love, Finished, Friends to Lovers, Part 1, Political Alliances, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Swearing, Women In Power
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2020-10-05 02:18:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 29,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20481230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theawester/pseuds/Theawester
Summary: They killed them. Her people, her neighbors, her family. Dead. She's the last survivor. The one the Narnians look to for protection from the Giants. They called her Aslan's representative and together they won the war, but war and politics are two different beasts. She can survive the battlefield, but can she survive the Narnian court? Can she survive the doubts? Can she escape the High King's gaze? What happens when her new family disappears? What happens when they kill her neighbors, her people?





	1. A Rude Awakining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome! I hope you like the story. The story is unbeataed and so if you like something or hate something, please feel free to drop a kudos or comment!
> 
> Enjoy!

I lifted my eyes, a scream tearing from my lips. Soft sheets and barely blue walls. Light streaming through the thin curtains of my window. Earth. I clutched my stomach, hands coming away clean. Where was the blood through my grey sweatshirt and leggings? Where was my armor? What the hell is going on? The door banged open, slamming into the wall behind a girl with a brassy brown bun on and a collegiate shirt. Joanna. Blood pounded in my ears. My heart squeezed tighter.

“Catalina?” Her glasses were slightly askew on her head. This wasn't right. Where did my people go? Why now? My eyes burned holes into the carpeting at her feet. A reverie, Lucy would have called it. I had so many things that needed answers. Who was going to protect them now? I stood up, mumbling about going back only to be stopped by her soft hand. 

“Whoa girl, you're home,” The brunette sat down next to me, taking my hand. I stayed silent with wide eyes to take as much of it all in. “You’re back home. We went out last night and you got plastered. We got you home and changed you.” Did we go out? It’s been five years since I turned 20. Yet, my hands were just as callous as they were when I left Narnia. I had to go back home. They would all die soon if I didn't.

“What’s going on?” Elizabeth poked her head in the room, squinting at the light. “Catalina?” I froze, staring at her. It had been so long since someone had called me that. I had let down so many people. Oh, Aslan. My chest tightened three more notches, choking on air. I felt her place her small hand on my shoulder before taking my hand. She was still the meek girl I had left. Meek, but kind.

“I had the most surreal dream, you wouldn’t believe it,” I whispered before looking at her. My body shuddered. Was it even real? These tears felt real enough as they slid gracefully down my face. Had I really let down my people for good?

“Sit down and tell us then.” Joanna patted the bed next to her as Elizabeth pulled me down. I didn't realize that I was standing up. It felt more like swimming with how heavy my body felt.

“I’ll go get coffee for us and then you can start.” 

* * *

My night began like a typical girl's night out. Singing to trash pop songs while sitting on the counter of the bed while your best friends doll you up. 

“It’s your birthday, Catalina! Enjoy the attention for once.” Joanna swept highlighter over my cheekbone while her sister, Elizabeth raked through the dresses. They were my best friends since we were in diapers and we had been inseparable since. 

“Maybe she’ll finally find a man tonight.” Elizabeth hollered through the bedroom of my small apartment. At 20 years old, I had been on one date and been kissed only twice in my life. Even though my friends thought I was the cream of the crop, I knew the truth. I was too brash. Too honest. Too much of a man.

“Or, she can get herself a girl!” Joanna giggled. I rolled my eyes at her and took the mascara out of her hands to put it on myself. 

“Or, I can finish school and figure it out later!” I mumbled between strokes, staring into my hand-held mirror. 

“Oh, what’s the fun in that? Here, you’re going to wear this.” Elizabeth pulled out a royal blue dress with a plunging neckline. I threw it on before they passed me a pair of white pumps and a gold headband with laurel leaves on it. I was stunning when the two got a hold of me, my heart melting at the two of them. They were good folks at their core being, but I couldn't shake the twinge in my gut. Was this a good idea? I shook my head. Of course it was, stupid. 

* * *

The club was dark and loud, people milled around the room, looking for a good time. The girls snuck me a drink and pulled me to the dance floor as a basic pop song played out. I accepted their gifts of drinks and quickly became buzzed. I was ushered to the bar for water as the girls found a partner and danced on them. Everything moved slower, like moving through water. This was funner! I giggled as I sat on the stool. What a silly word.

“Are you with them?” The bartender asked. She had long blonde hair and bright red lips. She took my empty glass with her red nails and filled it back up. Cute. I rested my arms on the bar, pushing my cleavage up slightly. 

“Yeah, it’s my birthday.” I smiled as the sadness started back in. A nagging voice whispered in the back of my head, _ “You don’t belong here. There is better yet.” _ I could never tell if that was someone more, or if it was my ambitions speaking. The best thing to do would be to ignore it.

“Congrats, this is on the house.” The blonde slid over a shot of some amber liquid and smiled as I took it down. My eyes shut as the burn soothed my anxiety. “Oh, it looks like your friends are leaving.” I shot my eyes open as I twisted my stool to watch them leave with their dance partners. _Fuck_. A groan slid past my lips as I paid the tab. Sobriety ushered quickly as I walked into the cool night air. I yanked my jacket tighter around my torso as the lone sound of my heels sounded down the empty road. This path had been walked so many times and yet in heels, the cracked concrete caught my heel. I gasped as I felt my body continue over my knees and fall on the hard walkway. A snap and a stinging sensation happened at once. Small rocks bit into my palms and the scent engulfed me. Swearing, I sat up, done with my night. Then, a flash of light and the rumble of thunder welcomed rain into the downtown. My fingers danced over my splintered shoe as I groaned. That’s what I get for buying cheap heels on Amazon. I rubbed my forehead as the rain poured on me. I couldn't help the prayer slip through my head.

_ Why me? Pick on somebody else!_

_ Catalina, you know that you are my precious daughter. All things happen for a reason. _

“But on my birthday?” I yelled. I rolled my eyes as the chill set in. So, maybe it was more of a complaint than a prayer.

_ Catalina, things will never be the same. _

“I don’t understand?” I turned around as the rain picked up. The blood in my veins moved quicker as I felt a wave of anxiety. Thick drops splattered on my jackets, the plunks loud enough to hear individually. I took off my shoes and rose to my feet. Next came off my headband. I had a terrible feeling. My blood moved too quickly to be healthy. Fingers twitched and shook. My hair blew wildly in tandem with the gusts of air. The sidewalks and roads desolate and grainy as well as quiet. I closed my eyes and felt the world disappear from under me.

_ It’s time to go, daughter. Remember that you are my precious daughter and that I love you. _


	2. The Beginning .

Oh god. My side burned with internal fire and my head, my forehead, throbbed in time with my heart. My body hurt and was stale. The call to move my body was too loud to stay in the warm slumber with the soft blanket over my body. I pushed my eyes open and rubbed the evidence of my long sleep out of my eyes. Ugh. My body felt_ grimy_. Dirt was jammed between my nails and skin, oil was thick on my face. Furs covered my chest, raw wood was used as walls for the small cabin room I occupied.

“Finally. She is awake.” I flipped my head to the bright light of the doorway, the pleasant sound of grasshoppers seeped into the walls of the small room. In the doorway stood a male fawn and a sprite with red flowing hair and white light flowing around her body to create a dress of air. What the hell is this? I'm hallucinating. Perhaps I was slipped something at the bar?

“What the fuck?” The haze of slumber gone, I was now attentive to everything around me. At least it wasn't raining and my hair was dry but very dirty. 

“I am Ferdinand. This is my wife, Sphial. We found you on the banks of the river, passed out. Sphial healed you from your slumber.” I lifted my eyebrow and grunted. Sphial was light. Her eyes shimmered in curiosity, body calm and ready to help. She wasn't meek, but she wasn't stealing the air out of the room either. Ferdinand's hair was curly, his hand within Sphial's. 

“Thank you. Where am I?” My throat was uncomfortable with the lack of usage. 

“North Narnia, our village is a mile up the main road. It’s called Shaeloc. Your belongings are on the chair in the corner.” I nodded, seeing my dress under my jacket. They had put me in a light gown to sleep in, and I was thankful. The summer air was sweet but warm. 

“Do you feel well enough to stand?” Sphial moved forward into the room as Ferdinand left, shutting the door.

“Yeah.” I took her hand and stood up before she presented a pair of pants and a top. Black and white.

“Let’s get you to the banks to have a proper wash up then you can eat and answer our questions.” 

* * *

I didn’t know how I ended up in Narnia. Ferdinand and Siphal called it Aslan. I wasn't quite sold. Ferdinand swore that his cousin, Tomas, had met him years ago in the revolution. As I began my first year with the unconventional pair, they taught me how to survive in their world. Sphial would teach me how to heal basic wounds through her home visits in the village while Ferdinand taught me how to fight and hunt to protect our village. Together, they taught me about the Kings and Queens and Aslan. The more I got to know Aslan, the more he would show Himself to me. Aslan would speak to me, granting me wisdom and strength through my second year with Ferdinand and Sphial. Through helping Sphial, I got to talk to the village elders and help them through their recovery periods. They slowly began to trust me, allowing me to shadow their meetings and plan community celebrations with them. I liked being apart of their community, it gave me a purpose until the giants came. 

* * *

The muck dribbled and sloshed into my boots, ruining my socks. I would have taken off my clothes and wadded nude, but the dumb buck was still dripping blood. I should have remembered my small hunting knife, but the night was still in it's hight when I embarked on my hunt half awake. I kneeled on the bank of the misty river, catching my breath with burning lungs. Parts of Earth I missed. Pre-packaged meats at the top of that list. I took a deep breath in to stand up on my wobbling legs and let that breath out slowly. Did I catch a charred scent? I couldn't be right. I inhaled slowly as to savor the Oak, Pine, and Beachwood fumes. Oh no. In the light of daybreak, the mist and fog wasn't really fog, but a light smoke. A weight dropped in my stomach as fear buzzed into my veins. I took off in a sprint up the hill towards the smoke. A deep laugh shaking the side of the hilltop pushed me forward. My neighbor’s home was on fire and the cause was looking down on me with a club. He was taller than the red oaks that grew in my forest. It took mere seconds to load my bow and pointed at his head. His skin looked more worn than my light leather arm brace, a loincloth doing very little to hide himself to my tiny figure.

“Hey! Come here and fight me, fucker!” He took several bubbling step to spot my minuscule form. As soon as I could see him, I let go of my arrow, striking him in the eye. He toppled immediately, groaning in pain. I pulled another arrow out and held it by the shaft as to slide it around his thick neck. It was bloody and nasty. Nessicary to watch the life leave his eyes as to stay on guard. Only a fool would wound a dangerous animal without securing its death. I could only hope that my neighbors had evacuated in time. Other homes burned in the distance up the mountain. We were under attack from the Giants. I needed to go find Ferdinand and Sphial. I grunted as I shifted off the giant, soaked in his blood. I was no stranger to gore. I was a hunter. He was still losing blood. I killed an intelligent being, not some dumb buck for food. I stumbled over a tree root, only feeling the wind leave my body. Sticky. Why was it so sticky?

_Get up! Child, your people need you. Go sound the alarm. This is just the beginning. _

Aslan? I didn't have time to waste if He was speaking to me so clearly once more. I sprinted home in time to grab my extra arrows, a few extra knives, and a spare sword.

“Cat! What is going on?” Ferdinand strolled into the dining area, hair messed up. He was sleeping in, allowing me to hunt on my own.

“Giants are attacking. Get Spheal up and go!” He nodded and ten minutes later we were out the door, running as the Giants burned our homes, fields, and families. We ran all the way to the next town where other survivors were meeting. Wounded screamed for their dead loved ones. As my family went to offer their help, I froze. The dead, dying, injured, and living all forced into one small town. Medical help was limited to Spheal and three others. Bloodstained cobblestones and smoke set the stage for the dying and the mourning. Was there always so much screaming when people died? So much raw emotion without abandon? My chest clenched. A soft tug on my damp pant leg pulled me out of the shock. 

“You were the one who killed the giant who burnt my home down.” I turned to face a badger who was halfway done wrapping his own wound. I bent down and helped him. The linen was soft against my chapped and broken skin.

“I am. I’m Catalina.” A soft mumble was to be my voice. I cleared my throat. 

“Alke,” He hissed as I tightened the knot to finish the wrap. “The giants are not particularly happy about the Kings and Queens forcing them back into their territory after the witch died. It only took them five years to get smart about retaliation.” I hummed and looked around to digest what the hell I could even help with. 

“ Do you think the monarchy will send troops to push them back?” Alke shook his head. The crown didn't do much to secure the borders. Most countries had an open border policy. We are no exception. However, the mountains were littered with the remnants of the Witch's followers. More of my neighbors were witch sympathizers than there were sympathizers for the crown.

“They’ll start by sending a local patrol first who reports back to Chair. I know a few of those blokes. A bunch of-”

“Idiots?” I offered Alke smiled and nodded.

“Quick lass you are.” I turned at the deep voice behind me.

“Ah, Luthor, how pleasant to see you. Catalina, this is Luthor, head of those idiots.” I snickered and held out my hand to the Centaur. He just looked at me funny. I put my hand back down to my side, shrugging, before turning back to Alke. 

“What poor man’s blood is on you?” He asked me. My eyes burned into the ground. 

“Giant’s blood. Shot an arrow through his eye, slit his throat.” I kept my answer simple and concise. I didn’t trust him and his dark eyes. He barked out a laugh and shook his head. I was not amused. I had killed an intelligent being and he simply laughed? My gut shifted. “I think it’s high time you were off reporting this to the capitol.” I stood up and went to help my family as much as I could.

“Careful, Catalina. Some might mistake you for Aslan’s Daughter.” I stopped and turned around to face him. Aslan had a daughter? 

“Who?” I felt the chaos calm slightly as I stared at the centaur. 

“Don’t worry about it, Catalina. He’s just being an ass.” Alke pulled me away to help Spheal with what we could.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Read and review, please!


	3. And That's How You Dig Your Own Grave.

The coffee warmed my belly and my trembling hands. Johanna and Elizabeth looked at me intently, waiting for my next words. I could tell that my story was out there. Hell if I didn’t carry the scars on my body, I wouldn’t have believed it either. I crossed my legs under me. My hands shook more with the caffeine. When was the last time I had actually had coffee?

“The royals had no clue what was happening?” Elizabeth spoke up from the other end of the bed. 

“I found out later that the Luthor was falsifying reports and got dishonorably discharged from the army. That’s why they were so late to respond. They thought it was just two giants when it was a whole hoard of them.” They nodded contently before letting me continue with my story.

"Five months after the first attack we had put together a seasoned militia to fight off the progression of giants. The village was rebuilt the best we could as we fended it from the Giants. I was a well-respected leader in my area, conversing with militias in the area to coordinate attacks. Rumors of the High King’s army arriving circulated, yet had not seen or heard of any real proof. Every day my hopes died a little bit more of the crown actually caring. It was up to us to fend off the giant nation. Apparently, I was one of the few who didn’t trust the crown. Just because one tyrant overthrows another doesn’t make them any better. I couldn’t figure out why these people adored them so much until I met them. That's when the whole game changed."

* * *

“Catalina, look.” I looked up from skinning dinner next to Alke. At the edge of our clearing, a centaur with dark skin and curly hair ran quickly towards us. On his chest sat the royal emblem of Aslan. Clean and shiny. Well cared for. He walked with confidence. This wasn't some messenger with a leather bag. This was a high ranking official in the military. I washed my hands as he neared us, trying to look unimportant. 

“Where is Mr. Winchester?” His deep voice was steady, yet demanding. 

“Who’s asking?” Alke stepped up between us.

“The Kings and Queens.” I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms.

“The High King has had months of preparation to contact us. Why now?” I spoke as I wiped my wet hands on my apron and made eye contact with him. 

“Where is Mr. Winchester?” I frowned at the repeated question. Mr. Winchester? They thought I was a man? Hate to tell them that a lady is doing their dirty work. The lion chest plate glistened in the sun, out of place amongst our dirty leather. 

“You mean lady.” I crossed my arms and rocked onto my toes. The Centaur tilted his head. “It’s Lady Catalina Winchester. I’m sorry about your lack of communication, but it seems to be a chronic issue at the capitol.” Alke shook his head and handed me a cloth to dry my hands better. I knew this was a fragile situation. I should be nice and play up the pleasantries, try to preserve my own hide.

“The Kings and Queens are calling all militias to gather five miles southwest of here. We must leave now.” Some men snapped their heads up quickly.

“Excuse me?” The centaur frowned and took a few steps forward. 

“You will come to camp with your militia and be a good girl.” I sneered and clenched my jaw. “Or be marked as a traitor and fed to the last remaining Giant before we kill them.” A smirk met the centaur's lips.

“Why now? The king had months to bring his armies north. Months to recruit us. Why now?” The centaur smirked and crossed his arms.

“Ask the High King.”

“Tell the High King to come to us. We are a day’s ride from the next bunch of giants. Going back down south will put us behind on schedule!” Alke glanced back to me, my men surrounding me. 

“Tell the High King that.”

“Tell the High King to get off of his arrogant ass and meet us here,” I mumbled back, looking to my men. They shuffled around, looking between me and the centaur. The tension was thick enough for even me to see.

“They’ll kill you and us. They need you. We need you.” Alke whispered to me. I huffed and pressed my lips together, thinking for a second. I could kill all of us, or we could try and make a difference. 

“I hate when you’re right,” I mumbled. “Fine! We’ll go with you.” The centaur smirked.

“We leave as soon as possible.”

* * *

I walked in front of my three militias, gathering them as we passed two more villages. The camp paused as we strolled in, gawking. I had chosen leather black leggings and a pink top with black leather guards on my arms, legs, and chest. Thigh-high boots laced up my legs. My ponytail swung like a pendulum with every step, empowering my stride. The centaur came to a halt and held his hand to signal me to wait there as he moved into the tent. Large and detailed, wealth beyond my imagination. I bet there was a bed in there. I would do anything to get off the ground at night. A few seconds later he came out with a horn and blew into it. My heart hammered in my chest as the High King Peter came out of the tent. His blonde hair was gold in the sunlight and his eyes were brighter than any ocean or lake. The legend was right for once, surprisingly. He was fantastic and grand to at least look at. Quite handsome as well. I could hear Alke hissing words at me, but I was frozen standing amidst the bowers. The High King tweaked his head to the side smirking before he sauntered towards me. He knew he was attractive and I hated him for that. Blood pounded in my ears. Dear Aslan, I hope I wasn't showing the burn I felt in the back of my neck.

“Where are you from?” British accent, velvety voice. Not quite what I was expecting. His voice was confident and made my heart flutter a bit.

“Narnia?” Even in the presence of a King, I was still a smart ass. Alke’s eye roll was almost audible to my question.

“Where in America?” Peter smirked. God my stomach dropped. Of course he would comb out my heritage the second I opened my mouth. Words twinged with twang and a drawl on occasion.

“Midwest. I woke up in a stranger's home and they took care of me like one of their own.” I reached out my hand for a handshake. “I’m Catalina Winchester. I’m the leader and coordinator of the militias. I look forward to our partnership.” Peter began to set his hand in mine and bring it to his lips, but I twisted his wrist into a handshake. A breathy laugh left his lips as he went along with it. I would not allow him to schmooze me into liking his charismatic self.

“Our partnership?”He raised his eyebrow at me and smirked. I was not amused.

“You had a general call me Mr. Winchester. I know for a fact with such a breakdown in communication does not just stop at title assignment.” I kept my voice low as to not embarrass myself if this went south. “If you want to win this war, you need facts from the front lines, and I am that expert.” The High King Peter laughed loudly, the murmurs of the troops arising. 

“Supper is almost ready for the troops, General Orious has told me you and your men have not eaten yet.” I nodded and then realized that we were still connected at the hand. I burned and pulled away, our callouses harsh against the others. “They shall eat with my men and enjoy, and you and I shall dine in my tent and discuss battle plans.” I could feel the heat gather in my cheeks as I nodded. 

“That would be wonderful, thank you, sir.” High King Peter raised an eyebrow before nodding and offered his arm to me. Heat flipped in my veins as I wrapped my hand around his elbow and strolled into the tent with him. He gave me a dazzling smile as I returned it, but much weaker. He was just being nice and kings were to be charismatic. The tent had a desk set for supper on both sides and two beds set on opposite sides behind that. I wonder if I could sneak in just for a few minutes of sleep? I looked down at the substantial spread. How many girls has he wined and dinned before? I needed to stop. I was just a girl doing a job. Nothing more. Nothing less. Duty first. 

“Please sit, milady.” I sat down as he pushed me in slightly to the table. His fingers brushed along my shoulder blades before returning to his side of the table.

“Call me Catalina.” The High King froze as he was sitting down and glanced up at me. 

“You don’t know, do you?” I knitted my eyebrows at the High King's question. 

“Don’t know what High King?” He took a calculating sip of his wine and leaned forward. 

“You don’t know what my people refer to you as.” His face was in awe of me. And it made me feel inadequate. Not to mention that if I slipped up, this could cost us the war, my people’s lives, and my life. I ducked my head.

“No. Tell me, High King.” I whispered and began to cut into my chicken. 

“They’re calling you the incarnate of Aslan’s daughter, Diana.” I shook my head at the reference. 

“The Diana is just a tall tale for children. That's absurd.” I interrupted him. Peter chuckled. 

“Well apparently, you’re doing your job tremendously well, even with the lack of communication from my men.” The High King set down his fork and took a sip of his spiced wine. 

“That lack of communication is why you’re five months too late to save the dead, High King-” I couldn't stop my mouth if I tried.

“Call me Peter. Do you know that not even my advisors talk to me like that, Diana?” I would have frozen, but my mouth just kept spewing words. 

“My job isn’t to suck up to you, High King. My job is to keep people alive because the crown’s army is inept at their own job.” The High King glared across the table as I gently sipped my wine. “Son,” I put down the glass and leaned over my plate, flipping my half-up hair over my shoulder. “If your men listen to you and take it lying down, you most certainly won’t like me.” Peter leaned forward and glared at me. I shouldn’t have said that, yet it was too late to back down. 

“You realize all I have to do is shout and I could have you dead in the blink of an eye?” I felt oddly calm in his threats. If Aslan delivered me this far, he would see me through this muck with the High King.

“You realize all you have to do is mayrterize me and then lose half an army and the war?” The High King stood up and I could feel the blood drain from my face. Too late to stop the word vomit. The High King stocked over to my side of the table and he pulled out my chair from the table with ease, myself squeaking, clutching to the armrests. He placed his arms on each armrest and leaned close to me. I could smell the wine off of his breaths and the heat radiate off of his skin. I’m sure he could hear my heart pound in my chest that matched my wide eyes. I could see the pores of his skin and the flecks of white in his blue eyes.

“You think you’re so important?” His eyes sparkled in the firelight and I could hear my heart pounding in my ears. My toes curled. My eyes snapped into a glare. “You’re not shit.” I snarled and shoved him off of me with open palms. 

“It’s not about me! It’s about the fact that we are the ones covering your ass by the border to protect our people! You have forefitted your duty onto your people.” I bit my lip as he stood chest to chest with me. 

“Covering my ass? This isn’t your country, not your people to-”

“Neither is it yours! It’s Aslan’s!” I was red in the face as was Peter. I stormed out of the tent, running into another human. The tall brunette wrapped his arms over my biceps and smiled at me before rolling his eyes and sighing and looking at the High King. I now realize that my hands were shaking. I pressed them against my pants to hide them. 

“Peter, are you getting pissy again? I really must apologize for his behavior. He’s just a bit stressed.” The Just King Edmund smiled at me again before gesturing with his arm. “Shall we?” I shook my head as Peter emerged from the tent, beet red and hair messed up. 

“Thank you for your hospitality, but I think I’ve overextended my welcome.” King Edmund rolled his eyes and glared at Peter as he let go of me.

“Nonsense. You’re staying.” I shook my head on the verge of tears and could not stop the shaking. 

“I think it would be best for the Lady Winchester to retire for the night,” Peter spoke first. “A good night's rest can aleve a mess of a day.” I scoffed and turned on my toes. 

“A mess you created, no doubt,” I mumbled. 

“I heard that!”

“Good!” I spat back. I shouldn’t have said any of that. I was a dead woman walking. This would have been so much easier if he was ugly and a rude person. Either way, I needed to find my men and settle in for the night. Perhaps I'll still have my head in the morning?


	4. My Mother Always Told Me to Quit While I'm Ahead.

I woke up right before sunrise, plotting. I couldn’t sleep last night with the cold, hard ground under my hips and now I needed to save myself from last night’s disastrous performance. I groaned before donning a dress, swearing under my breath as I tripped over my over skirts, tying the strings around my hips and adjusted my boot strings. I stood up, finishing my morning routine and left my tent. I liked being the first one up. Gave me time to think and pray. I wandered the woods until I came over a clearing and a cliff. I sat down and closed my eyes. Birdsong. Wind kissing my cheeks, playing with my hair. Grass tickled my fingertips and bare legs. Deep breaths. Peace.

_ Aslan. I’m here. _

Welcome, Child. Why are you so down? 

_ I have to face the High King again. I was rude to him and he wasn’t pleased with me. _

You will confront him. No matter what I tell you to do. 

_ You’re not wrong. I feel bad though. I’m also scared. What if they- _

You worry that I will not protect you. Why do you have such little faith, young one?

“I didn’t expect anyone else to be up this early.” I jumped and clutched my collar. I turned to the High King behind me and released the breath I was holding. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.” I smiled slightly and shrugged. 

“S’alright.” I patted the space next to me. “Come sit. Sun’s almost up.” He listened and sat down, brushing my shoulder. I shivered from the contact. 

“I’d like to apologize for my behavior from last night. It was unkind to you and unfair.” I never wanted fair. I wanted an opportunity. 

“Thank you. You’ll have to forgive me as well. I was harsh.” And I should have watched my mouth. Peter chuckled. 

“I enjoyed it, to be honest.” I picked at my nail beds, slightly nervous. King Peter wore a red tunic, a gold lion etched in the center. Handsome. I shook my head slightly, ridding myself of such thoughts. "Do you think we can win?" I shifted and thought about his question. 

“Not if you’re planning on attacking in the traditional way.” I stared at his blue eyes, ignoring my stomach on the roller coaster. “The giants are big. Hulking. Big creatures are slow. It’s best if we use guerrilla warfare on them, sending our smaller creatures out as positional spies.” Peter slipped off his cape and draped it over my skin. I trailed off my thoughts and narrowed my eyebrows. I didn't realize I was so cold in the morning air. " Uh, how have the peace talks gone?” He went on to tell me that the Giants had allied with a third party who was slowly taking over the throne. Long story short, not good. I scratched my chin as he continued on. 

“Wait, you haven’t sent an actual ambassador to them?” He shook his head. “And they’ve only corresponded by letter?” Another nod. “Something’s up.” 

“Catalina, oh! Your majesty.” Alke walked through the tree line. “Breakfast is served.” I thanked him and stood up, eager to hide my burning face from the king. 

"Thank you, High King." I handed him his cape, which he reluctently took.

"Call me Peter."

* * *

We continued to discuss battle plans over the course of the week before deploying into two battalions. General Orious took one while my small militias followed the High King in the other, forming our own platoon. We had fought off most of the giants, but still had two groups to fight to gain hold of our land. Our final stop was my home village and, with my bow in hand, we crossed my river. I was excited to see my family and my woods again. I leaped over boulders in the river and grabbed the High King’s extended hand to get past the muddy slope without falling. We had become agreeable to one another, almost friends. I looked into his eyes as I squelched out of the mud. It was contagious. I couldn't stop the smile that lited into my eyes. A good friend. I inhaled catching that familiar scent. Burning death. I squeezed his rougher hand in mine at our side now, fingers laced up. Not again.

“You smell that too?” His brows furrowed as he looked north. I followed his gaze to the small break in the trees to see an orange flame flicker. A familiar break that made me sick to my stomach. I tightened my grip and gawked before my body moved into motion. "Catalina come back!" Peter called after me. 

“Oh no. No, no, no.” I rushed past the High King into the clearing, pausing for a millisecond before pulling my bow and arrow out. My once home was up in flames, the giant bashing down onto the thatched roof. “Hey!” The giant turned down on me and reared back his club. I fired a shot up to his eye, watching his blood-stained club. I pulled out my dagger and ran between his feet, stabbing and slashing. I didn’t move quickly enough to dodge his kick sending me across the clearing. The breath was knocked out of me as burning pain radiated from my lower ribs. A clear snap graced my ears as I hit a tree trunk. I gasped for air as the pain registered. It crawled up my side and reached its claws in my chest. My head hurt and Narnia got quiet to observe the moment. The giant slowly lifted up his foot and stepped into the cottage, snapping the roof.

Dead.

He killed them.

Ferdinand, Sphial.

Gone.

Just like that.

Emptiness consumed me as the ringing deafened me. 

“Catalina!” Alke’s voice drifted in my ears. I brushed my lower ribcage, wincing and stood up, raising my dagger. Broken body be damned. I stood up, hissing, and sprinting towards the giant, throwing my dagger between its eyes while releasing a war cry, effectively killing him. He fell into my house, the flames engulfing it. If my family wasn’t dead, they were now. Why was death here? What did they ever do to her? I fell to my knees, the arms of a human softening the impact on the cold, hard, ground. 

* * *

I woke the next morning, joints crackling and sore. I was alone in the High King's tent. I snuggled deeper into the warm blanket. What? I sat up, groaning at the sharp pain in my stomach.

Ferdinand and Sphial were gone. A choked sob crawled up my spine. I wanted it to be me. That's why I left them. So they didn't have to die in this pointless war.

"Catalina?" The High King's voice announced his presence in his tent. Everything either felt like it was on fire or stabbing me or like a black hole in my chest, tightening my trachea.

"It _hurts_." I sobbed, pulling my knees up to my chest the best I could before pain shot up my spine. The High King quickly moved to reposition me flat then crouched in front of me, tucking my hair behind my ear. 

"None of it was your fault. They would have been so, so, proud of you." Peter brushed a soft cloth over my cheeks before lifting me gently into his lap, head against his beating heart. "Cry. Mourn. Take your time." 

* * *


	5. T is for Trauma

"Did your battles ever leave any scars?" Elizabeth handed off her cup as Joanna left to refill our cups, leaving the door wide open. I shrugged and stood up, going to my mirror, lifting up my top. There were the remnants of Narnia littered on my stomach and sides. Silver and reddish-brown marks littered my stomach.

So, maybe it wasn't a dream after all?

* * *

I hate winter. I hate the cold. I hate the snow. But Spring? It’s warm and inviting and I missed it. The mountain pass was insufferable as we had to go the longer route to get closer to the first city. I rode on a horse in front of my men, shivering in the mountain pass. 

“Catalina?” Alke caught my attention below. 

“Yes?” He offered my blanket back to me. I shook my head. “We’re almost out of the pass.” Mancha chuckled and turned around. 

“My lady, we are camping in the pass tonight.” I shook my head and let my teeth chatter slightly. 

“Who are you?” Alke asked. 

“Matcha. I’m apart of Ditmos’ pack.” I smiled. 

“Ditmos is the High King’s guard, right?” She confirmed my question. 

“Ditmos is fond of you. Likes your boldness with the King.” Alke gave me a weird look. 

“Boldness? That’s how you get yourself killed.” He mumbled. 

“Not with the Kings and Queens. They are very kind and humble. They like all kinds of people.” Matcha bristled slightly. Alke looked at me and I shrugged.

“Your lips are blue.” Alke lifted his blanket to me. Matcha looked back at our conversation before bounding off. She and some of the other talking animals did that to stay warm without blankets. As a wolf, her thick fur protected her more than a blanket would.

“My lips are blue, I’m a girl, and you’re Alke. Not new info.” I snipped at him. He shook his head and remained quiet. I grit my chattering teeth, shivering. Yes, I was cold. But not that cold. I could make it through the pass. Matcha sprinted back and walked alongside me. 

“The High King is requesting you upfront.” I squeezed my reigns and thanked her before the cold wind bit harder at my skin. The High King glared at me in only my leggings and wrap as I neared. 

“Seriously? Are you two years old?” I pressed my lips together. 

“Alke needed it more. We didn’t have anymore. My one blanket gave a blanket to four Narnians.”

“You’re lips are blue, milady.” Orious piped in from next to the High King. I glared at him as an involuntary shiver ran through me. He laughed and shook his head. “That glare alone could kill the entire Giant nation, General.” Peter laughed alongside him as he slid off his tartan from his shoulders. My horse fought against me to go closer to the King. He leaned over and draped the tartan over my shoulders, the warmth burning. 

“Thanks.” I blushed, thankful for the cover of the blanket. I rode the rest of the way to camp with the High King and his General. We made camp quickly, all of us wanting to get out of the cold. I was building a fire with Alke when the High King squatted down next to me, whispering in my ear. 

“I’ve set up an extra bed in my tent if you’d like. It gets cold in these parts and Ditmos’ pack will be there with us.” I blushed and bit my lip. 

“That’s improper. You should know that. Besides, we’ll be out of the pass tomorrow.” I whispered back as I stood up and tossed a stick in our prepped fire. Alke noticed the tension and excused himself quietly. 

“It’s not if there are others around. And, nobody else cares. Catalina quit worrying for others. We still have at least three more days in the pass. If you don’t get somewhere warm, you’re going to catch your death. Besides, your body is keeping you awake. You'll sleep better.” I flared my nostrils out. I could go for a solid eight hours of sleep.

“Fine. If you insist. But no funny business!” 

* * *

That night I found myself prodding around my section making sure everyone was content for the night. Most of them were in large packed groups to fight the cold. 

“I’ve got it, Catalina. Go get some sleep.” Alke squeezed my forearm before walking away to a sleeping huddle. I smiled and made the quick walk to the High King’s tent where he was reading over a new letter.

“Good news?” I slipped my shoes off with my wet socks and placed them next to the fire. 

“Colermine surrendered. Edmund is bringing his troops up north soon to join us. Just in case.” I smiled and patted his thick bicep. 

“That’s good. I told you Aslan is with them.” He nodded as I looked around. The pack was all curled up on the other bed, sound asleep. 

“That was supposed to be your bed.” I giggled.

“It’s fine. They’re cute!” Peter let a low laugh out. 

“Better watch yourself, Diana. You might be blessed amongst the people, but I will still come for you.” Ditmos growled out, half asleep. I covered my mouth as Peter bent over chuckling. I shoved him, mumbling an apology to the pack. Peter opened the sheets for me to slide in next to him. I snuggled into the pillow and turned to face him. 

“Have we had word back from our spies?” I whispered. 

“No. Most of them have yet to return. I’m hoping they will meet us after the mountain pass.” I rolled onto my stomach, leg brushing his. 

“What if they don’t come back?” Peter brushed my arm with his hand. 

“Then we’ll just have to starve the city and take the capital.” I shook my head. 

“That won’t-”

“Diana, High King, it’s late. Go to bed.” Matcha mumbled. 

“Sorry.” I rolled my eyes and poked the High King’s nose. “Goodnight, my king.” He smiled and held the sheets as I twisted my back to his chest and tried to keep a proper distance.

* * *

Over the next two days, I slept alongside the high king through the mountain pass and shared a tartan and a horse to stay warm. I felt slightly off about waking up in his arms but forced it into the back of my mind. If he wanted me, he would let me know. He was a cuddler in his sleep and I was touch-deprived. I took off my socks and shoes and sat them by the fire to dry inside our tent as the pack settled down. 

“Catalina.” Peter entered the tent and shucked off his jacket and tunic before his shoes. His golden chest shimmered in the firelight. This man is going to kill me. 

“What?” I switched out my own tunic for Peter’s spare shirt to rid my body of chills. 

“I have a letter from the spies. First time in months we’ve heard from them.” I sat down next to him, stealing the blanket. He smirked at me and pushed my shoulder before opening the letter. I hoped for the best news. I leaned against the High King’s shoulder and closed my eyes in the warmth. 

“If it’s bad news, I don’t wanna hear it,” I mumbled, nose against his bare skin. 

“They’re returning. They will meet us in Elmex. The throne has been overtaken by the second power.”

“Why haven’t they told us what power that is?” I pulled away to look at the letter.

“They said it’s complicated, and they’re not sure what they are.”

“Maybe it’s time to send in a diplomatic team then?” Peter folded up the letter.

“I have a very bad feeling about this, Catalina.” I felt him brush my leg with his fingertips. A bad feeling was shared amongst us, for two very different reasons. 

“We’ll sleep on it. Hopefully, it will make more sense in the morning.” I softly spoke as Peter inhaled before slowly exhaling. 

“She’s right, Peter,” Ditmos spoke before laying amongst his pack. 

“I’m always right, thank you,” I smirked before snatching the letter out of his hand and reading it. It was odd and formal for our spies. I couldn’t place my finger on it. Peter rolled behind me and lifted the blankets for me to situate myself before placing them over my body, dragging his arm against mine. I backed up against his torso for warmth and allowed his arm to settle over the curve of my torso and be lulled to sleep.

* * *

_“Who are you?” The water lapped at my feet. I kept my head down._

_ “Nobody.” I let the water swirl closer to me with every in and out. _

_ “You sleep with the High King Peter, that makes you somebody.” I smiled at her response. _

_ “When the war is won and we part our ways, I’ll just be another face.” I paused. “Who are you?” The woman came forth and smiled something sweet. _

_ “Jadis.” I felt cold looking into her icy eyes. _

_ “The name sounds familiar.” She smiled and waved her hand. My simple outfit turned into a royal gold and purple gown. I felt my heart swell at the beauty and glory. I was clean and the silks were soft against my skin. _

_ “I’m just a woman helping another find her way. I am important to Narnia, just like the High King.” She smiled and placed a gold tiara on my head. She stepped back and showed me to a mirror. I gasped. I was beautiful and powerful. Like a queen. _

_ “What are you?” The woman’s eyes flashed and I gasped. “The white witch.” Her smile dropped at my realization and she clutched my neck, pressing against my windpipe. I shook my head and hit her hand that suspended me in the air. The air thinned into my body as her hand restricted my windpipe. _

_ “The High King killed me. Kill him and I’ll tell the Fae to surrender.” I twisted my shoulders quickly around to break her grip. Jadis dropping me. Thick air intruded into my body, healing me. Jadis grabbed my hair and threw me down to straddle me and hit me. My nose bled and bruises would be apparent. I shook my head as I finally wrapped my hands around her throat and pushed as hard as I could, rolling my weight over the top of her. I closed my eyes as my vision blurred and darkness surrounded me. _

I bolted up from a dead sleep to a dark tent and Peter’s arm around my waist. I sat up, a slight ringing in my ears as I caught my breath. I touched my bleeding nose to find no blood.

“Catalina?” Matcha nosed my arm. 

“Bad dream. I’m fine.” I could feel her touch lingering, the weight of the crown still prominent on my head. Peter pulled his arm away from me and woke up chest to my back. 

“What’s happened?” I rolled my eyes. 

“Nothing, go back to bed. It’s fine.” I rubbed my temples and slid from the bed to the fire where my dry stockings were laid near. I pulled them on with my shoes and exited the tent promptly. I had to relieve myself and my throat was dry. I wandered through a small tree line to find a covered place. I began my trek back to camp before a hand grabbed my arm and pulled me to them. Anxiety built up in my system as blood pumped quicker. I slowed down my vision, fighting the man with his arms around my torso. I rolled my shoulders forward and lifted my right arm through the loop of their arms. I clasped my hands together and brought them down to break the hold. But, before I could bring them down, a hand came from my hips and slithered up to my face, shoving a cloth around my mouth and held me down. I shoved against him and felt the anxiety dissipate and my body calm down as I dropped into unconsciousness.


	6. Uh Oh...

I woke more tired than I already was before I got abducted. I was alone in a stone room, grimy and sore. Whatever they drugged me with worked wonders. I stood slowly and took account of my room. A singular mattress and chamber pot were the only items in the room. I pulled a loose string from my shirt and tied my hair up in a ponytail as the door opened. A pale blonde man floated in my quarters and I pulled myself up taller. 

“I believe introductions are in order.” His accent was something new, even to me. His features were delicate and whimsical and his movements supported the aura he held. 

“Who are you? Where am I?” I kept my questions short. 

“I’m Faramir. You are at the palace of the Giant King Dunmar.” I noted his pointy ears sticking from under his platinum hair. He was very handsome.

“You’re a fairy?” Faramir smirked. 

“Smart girl. No wonder the High King of the Narnians keeps you close to him.”

I ignored that comment as I crossed my arms.“So, the Giants and Fairies have an alliance?” Faramir nodded as I smirked. “That’s a smart move.” The Giants were dumb and blundering, unlike the Fae who were tricksters and the epitome of elegance.

“Come with me.” He exited the room, waiting at the door for me to lead. He took me down a series of corridors before having me enter a bathing room. “Bathe and get dressed. The Queen wishes to meet you.” I froze. 

“The Queen? Of the Fae?” Faramir rolled his eyes like I was asking a dumb question. 

“No of the Lone Islands. Hurry up.” I huffed and stripped down and eased my way into the bath. I scrubbed my body, careful of the small cuts and bruises I had obtained over the last few weeks. I let my hair down to wash it with pretty scented soaps, aware that this might be my last bath until the Narnians win. The fairies were cunning. I had to be careful. I dried off once my fingers began to prune and lifted the dress I was given. It wasn’t a dress at all. It was a pair of high waisted pants and a bra top. I lifted a sheer cover and laid it back down as I finished combing my hair. Once satisfied, I opened the door to see Faramir sitting on the floor. He glanced up and me and rolled his eyes. “You look horrible. Like a drowned cat.” I scoffed and thanked him as he drug me back into the room. “Put this on.” He laid the see-through fabric at my feet and allowed me to step into it, pulling it up to my hips. I pulled the straps over my shoulders as he lifted a belt of sorts. He drug his fingers across my bare skin and attached it around my hips to secure the fabric. He then took a matching gold platelet and attached it across my collar bone to keep the crossing fabric in place. “Here. Put these on while I do your hair.” 

“What’s wrong with my hair?” I slipped a matching pair of cuffs over the back of my hands and gold sandals over my feet, wrapping the strings up over my calves. 

“It’s wet and messy.” He gently ran his fingers in my hair as I sat on the edge of the tub. “In no time, I’ll have you looking like the Queen herself.” I chuckled as he piled my now curly hair in an assorted mop on my head and laced in a braided cord. “There, now you look acceptable.” I lifted an eyebrow. 

“Is it normal for your people to wear such revealing things?” He nodded, guiding me down the halls once more. It was silly in my mind to wear such a thing. It was cold here and my body had enough scars and stretch marks to repel anybody. Not to mention the wicked bruising from my broken rib a few months ago.

“Yes.” We stopped in front of two giants who opened the doors for us as Faramir pushed me forward. I stumbled in, alone to the giant room. The Giant’s had used dark, natural stones to decorate their palace, with dark accents. The Fae had decorated with light tapestries from their home islands east of here. Upon the dais, a thin woman with sandy blonde hair sat on the throne. Furs of other animals cushioned her seat. 

“Welcome to my palace. May I have your name?” The Queen stood up and glanced at me, approving of my attire. She wore a much more conservative dress that floated around her body. 

I crossed my arms in front of my body and scoffed. “I thought this was the Giant king’s palace?” The Queen began to walk down the dais and close to me.

“What is his is mine. Our alliance is strong.” 

“You alliance is strong only because they’re too dumb to notice you have contracted their lives to you,” The Queen’s smile dropped. 

“Please, what is your name?” She circled my body, examining the exposed skin as I answered her. She placed a hand on my bruised rib cage. My rib was fine, but the broken capillaries were still healing. “They call you Diana in these parts. Quite a force to be reckoned with. Come eat with me. You must be starved.” I shook my head. 

“You abducted me. Why should I trust you or your food? You’re a fae.” The Queen snapped her hand away before forcing a smile.

“You haven’t eaten in a few days. I can hear your stomach growling.” Yeah, so what if I was hungry and all I wanted was to drink a gallon of water?

“What do you want?” I snapped. 

“I want you to be content with food. Come sit.” I huffed and nodded, sitting at the table to the left of the dias. I needed food and didn’t care if it was poisoned. I was hungry. She sat down, collecting her massive floating skirts first. I strolled over across from her and sat down as well. She poured me a cup of tea. 

“Why did you abduct me?” She eyed me, smirking. 

"Because you intrigue me. A girl from nothing rising to the top of the High King’s army, and Aslan’s favor.” 

“I worked hard for my position within the King’s army.”

“You shared a bed with him, that’s how you did it. I’d hate to be his fiance.” I glared at her. Peter didn’t have a fiance? It clicked in my head. I didn’t like the idea of being so physically vulnerable with him because of this moment here. Power plays would involve me from here on out, and I was not worth the trouble. Yet, here we bloody were. Alke was right. This was only trouble. “Our spies saw you exit his tent, half-dressed in the middle of the night. Who does that other than whores?” I shook my head. “Don’t lie to me!” Her face twisted in rage as she threw half of the table on the floor. I steeled my face and buried my fear. 

“I’m not a whore.” The Queen raised an eyebrow. 

“You don’t deny sharing the High King’s bed.” I knitted my eyebrows together. Why did she even care who the King kept in his bed? Unless she thought because he cared for me, he would come sooner to the capitol. She might also think that I know what our battle plans are.

“Why do you care?” I leaned forward, ready for her explanation. The Queen’s face flushed as she clenched her fists.

“You’re not the one in a position to question others! Did you or did you not share the High King’s bed?” She screamed at me. I stood up as she had two men take me by the arms and shoved me to the ground. I glared at her as the cold seeped into my body, the clothing not doing much for me. “Did you or did you not share the High King’s bed, Diana?” She clasped her hand around my throat. 

“Why. Do. You. Care?” I gritted out as she squeezed my neck. I closed my eyes as blood rang in my ears. She wasn’t going to kill me. Not today.


	7. It's Not a Party Unless There's Drugs.

I should have begged her to kill me then. After Aslan knows how long, I’ve been in the capital starving. Faramir was a darling in these hard times. He brought me water and bits of leftover foods when he could. I refused to answer the Queen’s questions and she was not happy. Faramir entered my room and gave me a pity smile. I couldn't smile back. My energy was sapped. “Don’t give me that look, Faramir.” He sat in front of me and tucked a hair behind my ear. I curled my feet under my body and laid my head on his bicep. My eyes fluttered shut once more to see Jadis snarling at me. Nightmares saturated my sleep of Jadis questioning me, torturing me, and humiliating me. I'm sure I had dark circles under my eyes now.

“Are the nightmares still bad?” Faramir tucked a stray hair behind my ear. I nodded shuddering. 

“Between getting abused by the Queen during the day and then by the witch at night, I don’t know what else to do.” I only had one option. Wait for the High King. And at this rate, I didn’t have time for that. The Queen of the Fae would have killed me. “Why are you helping me?” Faramir wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him.

“Because soon the Narnians will end this war and I’ll be able to go home.” Faramir let his hands drag down my neck before he kissed it gently. I’ve learned that the fae were open in their physical affections towards others. It’s taken some getting used to, but his hugs and quick forehead, cheek, and body kisses were well appreciated to a touch starved prisoner. “Just remember what the real threat is. She won’t kill you. She won’t kill you unless the Narnians lose the war.” Faramir assisted me up and through the halls. He opened the dark wood door and pushed me in. I collapsed to the floor before rough hands hoisted me up and attached me to a table. I was too tired and accustomed to the routine that I moved with them, not refusing their guidance. A knife, salt, and water sat on the table next to them. I closed my eyes and slept as we waited for the Queen. As soon as I fell into a deep sleep, ice water drenched me and shocked my system. A gasp left my lips as the Queen took my face in her hand. 

“What are you doing?” She opened her hand for the knife, as per usual, but was handed a thick stick, sanded down. 

“Sleeping?” My voice was sore and cracked every five seconds. She reeled back the stick and hit me in the ribcage. The bone-breaking was audible, even the servants cringed at the sound. White flooded my vision as I pulled on my restraints. Ringing occupied my hearing. Like a mirror shattering from the epicenter, so did the waves of pain in my body. 

“Take her away,” I screamed as people touched my body, letting my body collapsed on the floor. I swore left and right, the pain stealing my focus. Faramir touched my arm, covering my mouth with a cloth. This wasn't normal. This was an escape from reality, from the pain. I took a deep breath in through my mouth, welcoming the peace. 

* * *

I coughed as I laid on my back. Cuts littered my body and burn marks marred my skin. Blood trickled down my hand as I removed it from my mouth. Faramir entered my cell and handed me a flask. I washed out my bloody mouth before drinking the water. I had just gotten back into my cell when he barged in. Searing pain kept me from moving. 

“The Queen wants to try something new tonight,” Faramir helped me sit up as he examined my body. “We’re bringing in a healer.” He waved in a young girl who stood in front of me. 

“I need her on her back. This is going to hurt.” I nodded and let Faramir move my body around. I whimpered as she touched the tender floating rib. She let her hands transform my cuts into scars and bruises into pale flesh. She touched my upper thigh and massaged them. I whimpered as Faramir took my hand and brushed my hair off my neck. She continued up, caressing my skin and healing my body. I gasped as she placed her hands on either side of my chest and healed the rest of my wounds. Warmth glowed through my blood. Calm settled in like a blanket to my body. I still felt tired, but I felt _good_.

“Thank you.” She nodded and kissed the back of my hand. 

“We’re counting on you, Diana.” I smiled at her words briefly as Faramir helped me stand. 

“Come, there is much to do.” He lead the way to the bathing room and let me enter. I stripped and bathed before lifting the thin garment. I rolled my eyes and wrapped myself in the towel and cracked the door. I leaned on the wall, trying my best not to fall asleep. 

“Faramir,” I mumbled. He looked up, smirking. “What the hell is this?” He stood up, entering the room. “It’s literally strips.” Faramir dug under the strips to lift a scrap of underwear. “No.” I tightened my grip on my towel. “I don’t think so. I’d rather die than wear that.”

Faramir’s smirk fell. “She noticed how much you hated her thinking you are a whore. So, she’s making you into one.” I sat on the edge of the tub, legs dangling. “You have to do this Cat. You can do it. I’ll make it easy for you.” My head snapped up. 

“How? How can you? She’s a bitch!” My hands shook as Faramir sat on the floor next to me. He grasped my hand and kissed it. 

“Just trust me. I hold power with the Fae. Just listen to everything I say and do it.” I looked away from his intense gaze as he tucked a stray hair behind my ear. “I have to make her believe that I’m on her side. No niceties out there.” 

“I don’t think I quite understand.” He nodded and sighed, placing my hands on his forehead. 

“Oh you’re so innocent,” Faramir looked up at me with despair. “You’re going to get treated like a whore tonight.”

“I’m gonna get raped?” Faramir shook his head at my narrowed eyes. 

“Not on my watch. You’re going to be groped and touched. But, hopefully by only me.” I snatched my hand away from his and smacked him hard against the cheek. 

“I don’t think so!” I stood up, arms around my waist. “You’re supposed to be the one that protects me!” I froze as he narrowed his eyes, holding his cheek. “Unless you’re using me to get back at the Queen,” I mumbled. His eyes snapped up, something dark inside them. He stalked over to me in a few strides and slammed his hand on the wall above me. I gasped as he placed his leg between mine, lifting me up. 

“Princess, if you haven’t noticed, I’m the only one who isn’t going to have you raped tonight. Everyone else in that room wants you raped or wants to rape you. I get first claims tonight,” He placed his hand on my throat and pushed slightly. My eyes widened at the Fae as I felt a weight slink into my stomach. “You’re going to listen to me tonight. If you don’t, you will die.” He traced my face and brought his lips to my ear. “Catalina Winchester, you’re not a whore. You’re Aslan’s chosen one. The Diana. And I’ll be damned if she isn’t with me.” He let go of me, walking away. I slunk to the floor to catch my held breath and placed my hand over my throat. With him? What did that mean? Faramir lifted up the underwear again and threw it at me. I snuck it on under my towel and turned away from him to pull on the corseted top. I felt Faramir’s hands pull on the strings in the back to secure it in place. His hands drifted down my back and rested on my hips. 

“I can’t keep you safe if you don’t work with me tonight, Catalina.” I felt a tear slide past my eyes and nodded. Faramir kissed the back of my neck. I wiped my eyes and turned around as he handed me a skirt like cover for me. I took his hand as he helped me into the last few pieces. He was the only rock I had to stand upon for the time being. Until Peter could get to me, or Aslan called me home. Faramir glanced up at me, frowning at the many new scars that littered my body. Whoever saw me tonight was going to see everything and I was not anywhere near ready. 

* * *

I descended the grand staircase to join the other fae and the few giants who were gawked at me. I kept my face steeled as my stomach violently protested. Massive cheers broke out when Faramir grabbed my arms and kissed me. I let a 'humph' fall from my lips at the impact. He was a good kisser, I'd give him that much. My body squirmed as he tried to sneak his tongue in my mouth. A hand slid down to my lower back. I let my body relax under his touch. I couldn’t say I wouldn’t have liked it if the circumstances were different. I felt him pull me closer and let his hand slide down my back to my butt and grab it. That’s what got me to gasp. He brushed his tongue with mine, leaving a small pill behind. I swallowed it immediately. I felt light and calm and wound up. Every time Faramir touched me, my body hyperreacted. I melted in the bliss of his touches, not minding the lack of personal space. Then, the drugs kicked in completely. 


	8. All's Well That Ends Well. Except For This.

“Catalina, get up. Now.” Faramir brushed the hair out of my face. I groaned with the worst hangover. 

I rolled over, mumbling a “Fuck you” and lifting a middle finger to him. Flashes of the previous night came back to me in spontaneous order.

“Damn it, Catalina. Get up. You need to get ready,” I burrowed into my sheet in response. Two-ish weeks of being drugged were draining my body. We now had to cake my face in makeup to hide the deep black circles under my eyes and the development of zits on my face. I wanted to throw up every time I moved. “The Narnians have sent the Kings to negotiate the terms of the Queen’s surrender.” I opened my eyes and shot up from my bed. The little light in my cell throbbed behind my eyes as nausea washed over me.

“What?” Faramir nodded and helped stabilize my body. I swayed nauseous as hell with his arms around me. I closed my eyes as he pulled me tight to him. 

“The High King Peter and King Edmund are coming today to discuss terms of surrender with the Queen,” He paused and tucked a hair behind my ear again. A comforting action he had built up over the weeks. “She wants you there to taunt him. I’ll be there with you.” I nodded. 

“So nothing changes from the parties to the Narnian embassy?” Faramir chuckled and took my hand. 

“Diana, everything changes from here.” 

* * *

Faramir placed me in a deep rich purple floor-length dress with gold accents. My hair was braided and placed within a gold headdress. My hair was always braided nowadays. Faramir could grab it and guide me without hurting me. I was escorted into the great hall and thrown on the floor before the Queen. Faramir bowed above me before grabbing my hair and pulling me up. I let out a fake yelp as I glared at the Queen as we neared her throne. Faramir threw me to the ground exceptionally hard as he took his throne. He spread his legs and pulled me between them. I kept my eyes on the floor as the Queen stood. 

“Faramir, may I introduce the Narnian embassy. The High King Peter, King Edmund, the Narnian general Orious, and the king’s guards: Matcha and Ditmos.” Faramir stood up and grabbed my hair, allowing me to stand before guiding me down the steps. The queen stayed as we neared the Narnians. Faramir let go of my braid, gently setting it along my shoulder. A full beard covered Peter’s face and dark circles pulled at his under eyes. 

“Catalina-” I gave him a sad smile as Faramir’s hand touched the back of my arm to guide me forwards. I took a step forward and hugged the High King. I relaxed as I sunk into his body. I could feel the tension in his body.

“Stop looking at Faramir like that and get your shit together. You get me out of here. I want to go home and sleep.” I felt Peter’s hand cover my back and pulled me into his chest, relaxing slightly. 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t get here sooner, Catalina.” I pulled away and placed my hand on his cheek. 

“You’re here now High King Peter.” Faramir drug his hand from the back of my neck to grab my braid. I stepped back and smiled at Peter before a swift tug pulled me back to Faramir’s throne. The queen looked on with curious eyes to the Narnians before Faramir pulled me into his lap this time. His one hand remained on my thigh, tracing down to my knee and up slightly into the slit. I inhaled and flexed my thigh as I squirmed. The Queen chuckled and stood up. 

“High King Peter, my spies have told me that on the night of the Diana’s capture, that she shared a tent with you. Is that true?” I stiffened and spoke before Peter could. 

“That’s what you are going to lead off with? You know the answer to that already.” I spoke sharply. Faramir lifted me by the hair with a sharp yank and backhanded me into the floor. The Queen crouched low to the floor and yanked me by the scalp. I hissed as she looked me in the eye. 

“Are you royalty?” I smirked at her question. 

“Power and royalty are not synonymous terms, milady.” Her face fell as she sent a swift kick to my abdomen. I gasped for air as she then placed her foot on my neck. 

“My Queen. Perhaps it would be best to let her live.” Faramir stood close to her and told her something quietly. She smirked and nodded, prodding me with the toe of her shoe. 

“Get her out of here.” I rolled over and gasped for air as Faramir yanked me up once more to my quarters. Once we were out of sight, he let go of my hair and encircled me with his arms. 

“Cat, lean over and breathe.” I nodded as coughs erupted from my soul. I gasped as Faramir lifted me up and finished the quick hike to my room. I held tight to him as tears dripped down my face. “Breathe with me, princess.” I felt his hands up and down my back as I leaned into him. I sniffled as he kissed my forehead and handed me a handkerchief. Faramir laid me down and pulled the sheet up. “One more night Catalina.” I nodded as he flew off, the door shutting me into darkness once more. What was he plotting with her?

* * *

I was woken up by my name being whispered in my ear. I hummed as warm hands traced my cheek. Faramir tucked my hair behind my ear and went back to trace my cheek. 

“Are the negotiations finished?” Faramir whispered a yes to my mumbling. I swear he had the hearing of a hawk. “So can I go home?” 

“Not yet. The terms are simple. Giants stay in their land, we go home, Narnia gets their Diana back. However, the Narnians have to spend the night.” I opened my eyes and shot up, clutching the sheet to my chest. 

“What?” 

“They have to spend the night.” Faramir shook his head. “I told the Queen that if we were going to lose the war, that she must at least damage your reputation with the King.” I froze. 

“Will you drug me again?” Faramir shook his head. 

“You need to be sober tonight. I’ve been in discussion with the High King already, preparing him for what is to come.” I nodded. 

“What’s the point then?” He smiled. 

“Rebellion, princess, rebellion.” I didn’t understand but was too excited by the prospects of going back to Narnia. He took my hand and pulled me to the bathroom, pulling out a gold dress with flowing fabric all around my body. My hair went back up and before I walked to the door Faramir grabbed my elbow gently. I turned with an eyebrow raised as he held up two gold ribbons. 

“Come here, princess.” I nodded as he took me by the back of the upper thigh and lifted a leg up to the rib of the tub he sat on. He tied the ribbon around my thighs and tied it off in a double knot. 

“I don’t know whose idea it was to put me in such horrible outfits for me. Every time I step, something jiggles.” Faramir smacked my thigh, leaving a red imprint. I punched his bicep in retaliation. 

“The High King was certainly enjoying you in the throne room. And besides, you’ll see the other Fae lords envying you tonight.” I scoffed. 

“Well according to the Queen, he has a fiance. I’m not that important.” Faramir kept his hands to himself as we walked and for once in my miserable stay, I felt excited for tonight.

* * *

We entered the grand ballroom, Faramir’s arm now on the small of my back. Faramir pointed out the Narnians as we descended the staircase. Edmund prodded his brother’s side and pointed up to me. 

“The High King certainly likes what he sees, Diana,” Faramir whispered in my ear. I looked to the High King Peter and locked in on his blue eyes. His mouth dropped as he drank me in. I glowed tonight. The soft skin of my thighs and stomach were on display for all to see, but I only wanted one in the room to see me. I blushed as I tried to flex my abdomen to look smaller. Faramir felt me tense up under his hand. “Catalina, stop. He adores you.” I felt light-headed as we maneuvered to the wine area. 

“Engaged,”I whispered. Faramir handed me a cup and waited for me to get tipsy before grabbing my braid and forcing me on his lap. We sat at the same table as the Narnians and the Queen. Faramir brushed his thumb under my chest and moved his hand over my thigh. I kept my eyes down to avoid judgmental stares and the anger of Peter. The Queen spoke first. 

“Diana, how was your stay?” The Fae looked at me curiously to my answer. 

“The fae are very kind and hospitable. They’ve helped me through weeks of abuse and torture provided via you and your henchmen. Now that you’ve lost the war, I wonder what your people think when grain supplies from Narnia cease?” Edmund snorted before sipping from his cup as the Fae lords looked to the Queen. 

“You can’t prove it.” She snarled. I couldn’t help but smirk. Payback was a bitch and oddly enough, it was twice as poisonous coming from a “whore”. 

“They’ve already seen the scars, milady.” I crossed my arms, pushing my chest up. A long red scar danced its way down my breast that now saw the torchlight. The Queen stood up, grabbing my braid and pulling me off of Faramir’s lap. I winced as she drug me into a hallway, my eyes watching Faramir hold back the High King. I was slammed into the floor and kicked in the gut. I gasped to refill the air that had left me before another kick left me coughing.

“You whore! How dare you!” She threw her foot at my face, busting into my nose. It didn’t crack, but it still bled. “Tymol, she’s yours to use tonight.” I looked up, blood draining to my toes, as a bulking fae in rags moved from the darkness and grabbed my braid. I cried out, hands over his to pry them away as he bashed my head into the stone wall. My vision blurred and a terrible ringing in my head refused to release its grip on me.


	9. My Mouth Should Have Stayed Shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sexual Assult and mentions of rape. Feel free to skip!

Rope burned on my skin as it slid tighter. I groaned as large calloused hands shook at me. “Wake up, bitch. I don’t like whores who can’t see me.” My nose scrunched at the pungent odor of piss and blood. I felt a jolt of heat rush up my body before registering as a burning pain. I gasped as the fae pulled off a burning iron. I felt overheated in a small area and anxious.

“You lay a finger on me, I’ll kill you myself!” I hissed. The burn was red and ugly, but he had obviously used a brander for livestock on me. The fae man took a step closer to me and lifted a knife to my throat. His left eye was yellow instead of white. I grit my teeth, I would not go down without a fight, despite the burning pain and rising bile. Thank Aslan for adrenaline.

“Go ahead. Get out of your bonds. I’ll still screw you into next week.” A blanket of pain over my body slowed my reaction as he dropped the knife down, a red mark following it. I gathered my courage and bit my tongue. This was not going to go down as a power struggle. I refused it to be so. The door opened and the Queen entered the room. I glared at her as she laughed. The thin strip covering my chest was now cut off. At least I still had my bottoms.

“She’s so pathetic. Come on Diana, you enjoy being treated like a whore.” She traced over the bleeding scratch and down to the old scar. Her cold hands didn’t stop there. I grit my teeth as I pulled at the bonds. She laughed in my face as the doors opened. I snapped my eyes to the door as the other male fae in the room grabbed a knife. Faramir and a handful of guards entered the room to witness her hands inside my bottoms. Faramir pulled his own blade, stabbing the Queen in the back. She collapsed on me, bleeding over my body. A gasp slipped my lips as I felt her blood slip on my skin and her weight push into me. Faramir pushed her off on the ground as guards killed the other fae and left the room. I collapsed onto Faramir, panting after he cut my bonds. He pulled his shirt off and covered me with it before lifting me into his arms and carrying me down the halls. He stopped in front of a large wooden door and kicked it in lieu of knocking. Edmund opened the door, quickly ushering us inside. I was laid down on the couch as Faramir lifted a section of my shirt to show my burn. Peter entered the room, holding a change of clothes. 

“Why is there so much blood?” I shook my head, eyes heavy. Faramir’s body was a safe haven for me as I nuzzled into his chest. 

“Not mine. Ah!” I pulled closer to Faramir as someone touched my burn. 

“She needs to bathe before I can treat it.” Peter nodded to Faramir.

“Already done. Here, if it’s okay, I can help you.” Peter held out his hand to me. I nodded and pulled the shirt down. Peter lifted me up and carried me off to the washroom. I clutched his shirt as he placed me on my feet. 

“She didn’t deserve the death she got. It was too kind.” I mumbled. 

Peter lifted my braid and undid the binding. “She’ll suffer for harming a lady of Narnia.” Peter’s hands brushed my hair out of the braid, focusing on the strands. I was too tired to tell him I wasn’t a lady. 

“I, ah,” Blood rushed to my head as Peter nodded. “I need help.” 

“Of course.” He lifted the hem of the shirt up, revealing my bloodied skin. He was a gentleman as he helped me into the tub and handed me a soapy cloth. I started with my arms and legs before moving to my torso. I dabbed carefully at my wounds as Peter washed my hair. I gritted my teeth as my head became light. Peter stopped and took my hand. Black dots covered my vision. I felt him moving quickly around me before pulling me out of the tub, wrapping me in a dressing gown, and laying me on the cool floor. I let my eyes flutter shut as I couldn’t fight anymore. I was with friends and could give in to the weight seeping from my bones into my head.


	10. My Neck, My Back, My Everything Hurts.

I woke up to soft bandages on my body to cover my wounds. I hummed at the strong hands along my skin. 

“Catalina?” I lifted my eyes open and felt Peter’s fingers on my face. 

“Yeah?” I whispered. 

“How do you feel?” His eyes were stunning and his hands felt so good. I closed my eyes.

“Sore.” Peter nodded. His hair glittered in the flame light and his beard added an extra element of masculinity. He was engaged. Stop it.

“I’m almost done. Sit up.” I complied, careful to keep my robe over my body. He slipped his fingers in my bandages to tuck away the access fabric. “Do you need help dressing?” Peter pulled me up slowly. I shook my head, no longer feeling unable. Peter nodded and kissed the back of my hand before leaving. I dressed in a simple blue nightgown and exited the bathroom after combing my hair out. All members of the room looked to me, eyes burning into my soul. I looked away, burning and not wanting a lick of attention. A giant mirror caught my reflection as I passed in front of the bed of the closed room. The shaking off my hands was secondary as I touched the bruises on my chest and neck. I knew it was bad, but I didn’t know it was that bad. 

“I can’t apologize enough for what happened here, Catalina.” I jumped at the High King standing in the doorway. I crossed my arms over my neck to hide from him. 

“I wandered away. S’ my fault.” 

“Faramir cares for you.” I snorted and felt a blush rise up to my cheeks. 

“Faramir is only looking out for me because I’m the Diana. Whatever that means. Nobody will flipping tell me.” Peter frowned.

“You don’t know what the Diana is?” I shook my head, gesturing for him to go on. “Myth says that the Diana is Aslan’s daughter incarnate. She is the protector of the Crown. There has been only one on the record before. When the last Diana was around, it was before the witch. The witch killed her along with Narnia’s alliances," He paused, still boring into my soul. "Thank Aslan for Ed. Ed’s been great with rebuilding those relationships.” 

“Why thanks, Pete. I do believe that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.” I jumped as Edmund poked his head into the bedroom. Peter clasped his hands behind his back.

“It’s called knocking Ed.” King Edmund rolled his eyes and entered the room carrying a garment bag. 

“You’re not my father.” Peter cracked a smirk at Edmund as he draped the bag over the bed. 

“And you still don’t know how to do as you’re told.” I smiled at Peter’s response before standing up and looking at the bag.

“What’s this?” I spoke as I opened the bag.

“It’s Pete’s dress for tomorrow. It’s gold. Brings out his eyes fetchingly.” Peter stood up and pushed Edmund. I rolled my eyes as the boys wrestled a bit. A stunning purple Narnian riding dress was within the bag. 

“Someone’s in love!” Edmund tried to mumble. It didn’t work. I heard it. 

“Shut up you bugger! Get out of my room!” I couldn’t help but chuckle at Edmund as he exited. I took the dress and the accessories out and hung them up. Peter bent over and handed me a dropped stocking ribbon. 

“What happened to your ankle?” I took the ribbon as Peter examined the massive scar on my foot. 

“They thought it would be funny to burn my feet.” Peter placed my foot back on the floor before looking up at me. I wiggled my toes, frowning before catching Peter’s tired face.

“What else did they do?” He whispered. 

“My aunt cut her to shreds and ripped a couple of nails from her. Also, she almost had her raped.” Faramir entered my room. Peter stood up, backing away from me. “Sorry to interrupt.” He smirked at me. I knit my eyebrows. 

“She did rape me, asshole. Call a fuckin' spade a spade.” I mumbled. She didn’t have children. That would mean that, holy fuck. I threw my ribbon on the bed and turned to face Faramir, crossing my arms. 

“Why are you upset?” Faramir glanced at me and then Peter. Peter knew what was up as well.

“You didn’t tell me you were the bloody Prince of the Fae!” I fumed. She was his regent.

“I thought you knew?” Faramir crossed his arms. 

“No, I fuckin’ didn’t know! Why didn’t you just stop her? Why didn’t you tell the others to fuck off instead of drugging me and forcing yourself on me?” Peter’s face drained of color. Faramir's face pulled tight as it did in the washroom way back when.

“I did not do such a thing. I told you I would not harm you.” I scoffed.

“No, instead you made everyone think I’m a whore! You and your bitch of an aunt!” My hands shook as red cluttered my vision. My chest heaved heavy breaths.

“My Aunt and I are not the same. I am a much different ruler than she ever was.” His spoken words filled my ears and disintegrated any bit of filter I carried.

“You’re cut from the same cloth as her. Both of you are the embodiment of the sleazy, diabolical, fae.” Faramir’s face flushed red as he moved slightly forward.

“Princess, watch yourself.” He hissed with a step towards me. His eyes glimmered with as much anger as mine carried. Peter took a step forward.

“Don’t. Call. Me. That.” I snarled. Faramir grabbed my arm and pulled me into his body. My eyes shot open as I froze. 

“Catalina, stop pretending that you’re nobody. Aslan will make you Queen of Narnia someday, and I’ll be damned if the Queen of Narnia and the Diana are not on my side.” He whispered, words not fit for anyone besides the two of us. Appalled, I pulled my arm away from him and his hushed tone. 

“How dare you assume such a thing!” I was pissed. Red blotted my vision. “How dare you-”

“You love the power, Diana!” I grit my teeth and balled up my fist. He shouldn’t have known that. 

“Fuck you Faramir!” I punched him across his face. “And fuck the Fae!” I threw another punch across the arch of his nose, enjoying the crunch underneath my knuckles.

“What the hell Diana?” Faramir’s nose dripped blood as he stayed hunched over.

“Fuck you for treating me like a slut. Fuck you for subjecting me to hell for the past, Aslan knows how long. And, fuck you for being an asshole! And fuck you for calling me, Diana!” Faramir’s eyes narrowed into slits before taking a step forward. Peter immediately pulled me behind me. I clutched onto the back of his tunic, my nose pressed into his shoulder. The tremor wouldn't stop. 

“Careful Diana. You reveal yourself.” Faramir mocked me before Peter pushed me into King Edmund’s arms who lifted me out of the room. I shouted as High King Peter landed a punch to Faramir’s jaw. 

“Edmund! Put me down!” The King Edmund threw me onto the couch, holding my shoulder down. 

“Catalina! Calm down.” I huffed and pushed his hand off of me. “Those two hold each other accountable for their people. You are the hinge point between the Fae and Narnians.” I rolled my eyes and ran a hand through my hair. 

“Excuse me, but last I checked, I’m not Fae.” King Edmund smirked. 

“No, you’re not. You’re Aslan’s daughter incarnate. The Diana. And that makes a world of a difference.” I knitted my eyebrows together.

"I'm not who you think I am." Edmund sniggered. 

"Just because you don't understand doesn't mean that I don't either." I pressed my lips together.

“Say I am Diana," I whispered. "Faramir killed the Queen for me,” I looked to Edmund who was patient in my thought process. “That means his stance is with me.” Edmund shook his head. 

“Not with you. The people don’t call you Catalina here.” 

“They call me Diana. Aslan’s daughter.” I paused, now pacing the floor. “That means that he took a stance behind Aslan.” Edmund smiled and nodded approvingly.

“So you’re important to Peter because you’re his subject and important to Faramir because you are Aslan’s representative. Let them have a go at it and see what happens.” I nodded, watching the door open and a disgruntled Faramir storm out. He was quiet. King Edmund glanced at the door and nodded his head at it. “You should go check in on him. Knowing him, he’d just yell at me.” I nodded to the just King who left behind Faramir. Peter was cleaning his hand in a washbasin. 

“Did you kill him?” leaned against the door frame, gauging his reaction to me. Peter glared into the red water. 

“I should have.” He mumbled. I closed the door and knelt in front of my king. I took the washcloth and cleaned his hand for him. “You don’t have to do this Catalina.” I smiled. 

“Call it fair for getting me out of here. All things are finished here. Be content. Besides, if Edmund can get to Faramir, we can gain a new trade partner out of this.” Peter nodded. 

“We should leave as soon as possible to allow Faramir to sort this mess out.” Peter calmly spoke. He inhaled as I pressed too hard. I mumbled an apology as I dried off his hand, finished. 

“If we can leave by dawn, that would be best for everyone,” I spoke in a hushed tone before crawling into the covers. “Besides, the sooner I can get across the border, the better.”


	11. Home Sweet Home

"We left the next morning to come back to Narnia." I washed the mug out in the kitchen with Johanna and Elizabeth listening at the island. "Edmund was the hero that night. Got Faramir's head out of his ass and he apologized."

"He just apologized?" Johanna gasped. "He let you get raped!" I shrugged at her and scrubbed the brown mark away on the ceramic. 

"He made up for it once he left Giant country. He was a better man without his aunt influencing him." I washed the mug out. 

"What happened after you got back home?" Elizabeth asked. 

"General Orious was good friends with some of Ferdinand's family from the revolution. He made me a general in the High King's military. King Edmund granted me the title Lady of the Northlands and unofficially Diana." Johanna stood up and grabbed a towel to dry off the cups. 

"You really went through all of that, didn't you?" She whispered. "Do you still have the scar?" My hand pushed aside the neckline to reveal the pink bump. "Oh my god."

* * *

A month later, I stood under the archway of Cair Paravel as our small band entered. I looked up to the Queens Lucy and Susan and a whole host of people as we neared. I wore a light dress, the scar on my chest prominent. A thin and willowy woman shoved the Queens and sprinted, chest bouncing, to the High King Peter on my left. I raised my eyebrows to King Edmund who just shrugged as we dismounted. This must have been his fiance. 

“Oh, darling! How I missed you so!” Peter kept his hands lightly against her back, giving sympathy pats. So, not engaged? I couldn’t see a ring on her boney fingers.

“Lady Savannah, it is more than generous for you to wait for me this long. Queen Lucy and Queen Susan must be excellent hosts.” Peter gently pushed her away as she smiled. Then it was like a shark caught a whiff of blood in the water.

“Who’s she?” I bit my cheek and stuck out my hand on instinct and smiled.

“This is our new lady of the court, Lady Catalina. She helped Narnia win the fight against the giants and Fae.” She gave me the up-down look, deteriorating any bit of self-confidence I had before turning her nose up at me. I retracted my hand and nodded my head instead. She took two quick steps to me and poked my scar.

“Are you okay?” I was appalled by her brash behavior and it made me sick. Spoilt little brat. I clasped her hand in mine and took a step into her personal space. I would not be made less than from little children who made fun of my scars.

“Excuse you! It would behoove you to let go of what is not yours and move away from my personal space.” She paled and moved away, King Edmund speaking first.

“I think it would be best if you were kinder to a friend of the royal family of Narnia. You should return to your family.” Peter offered his arm to me as he escorted me past the Lady Savannah and to his sisters. Queen Lucy was quick to tackle me in a hug. She let go and held out her hand. 

“Diana, a pleasure to meet you!” I grasped her hand and gave her a firm handshake. Queen Susan was next. She too pulled me into a hug, many people giving an odd look to us. 

“Thank you for being there for Peter while I was out of the country.” I nodded at her whispers and smiled at the Queen. 

“Thank you, Queen Susan.” She shook her head. 

“Please, call us by our first names.” Peter chuckled next to me at Susan’s remark.

“Susan, I’ve tried. She still uses my title.” Edmund spoke, elbowing my side.

“Come, let’s get you inside.” Lucy took my arm and hurried me past the other onlookers and up the grand staircase. She took a few lefts and rights before passing the royal rooms. She paused at the door and opened it. Unlike the Fae’s use of air and light, or the Giant’s use of dark, sturdy materials, Cair Paravel utilized the balance of the materials. “Peter’s next to you on your right. Edmund is next to Peter and I’m across the way. Susan is across from Edmund if you need anything.” I thanked her as she left me to explore. My rooms had a theme of white with blue accents. The sitting room was small, glass french doors lead to a stone balcony overlooking the eastern sea. I smiled at the warm breeze and salty air. I giggled as I turned back inside to the bathroom. A white tub with claws was paired with a basin in the countertop, makeup littering the surface. A small note was tucked by the mirror. 

_ Catalina, _

_ I left a few dresses in your wardrobe and _

_ Some feminine things you might be interested in. If you don’t want something, _

_ Please leave it to the maid to pick up tomorrow morning. There is a ball tonight after dinner _

_ To celebrate our victory and the departure of Lady Savannah. _

_ See you then, _

_ Queen Susan Pevensie. _


	12. Late Nights=Bad Ideas

That night I laid on the floor in front of my fireplace, reading about the history of Narnia, covering any gaps that I had missed in my time here. I was trying to find history on the Diana, or lore at this point. I closed my book slightly as I glanced out to my balcony. The sun had set about an hour ago, light pinks and oranges painting the edges of the sky. I had enjoyed it for a moment before returning to my book. The sunset would look marvelous from across the castle, but my skyscape would come from the morning dawns. I looked up to a portrait of Aslan. He hasn’t spoken to me since that day on the ridge, and I missed him. I laid my head on the ground and shut my eyes. Just for a second. I was finally clean and warm, wrapped in salty air and furs. Delectable domestically lulling me to unconsciousness.

_ Fire filled my senses. I looked around and saw a tall man staring at me. A light white dress clung to my curves. I felt joy bubble up from my soul, the fire building. I broke into a sprint and jumped into his arms. His strong hands found a way to my hamstring to hold me close. I touched my forehead to his, speaking words of love. I closed my eyes as he brought his lips to mine. _

I opened my eyes, alone. I huffed as someone knocked on the door. Sitting up, I marked my place in my book before tossing the blanket onto the couch. I pushed my hair off my neck and opened my door. Peter was leaning on the door frame with a bottle of wine and two glasses. I smirked, “What’s this?” 

“Lady Savannah is gone, we won the war, you’re home. I’d say that’s enough cause to drink tonight.” I chuckled and let him in, rubbing my eyes. How sweet of him to bring me wine. My heart clenched at the mere thought of it.

“Any excuse to drink is a good reason.” He laughed and walked out to my balcony and placed the glasses and bottle down before holding out a chair for me. The music from the ballroom drifted through the air into our small space. “You shaved?” I pouted. 

“Yes. Susan thought it was only proper for the ball. Which, you were missed from.” He poured me a glass, passing it off and flashed a dazzling toothy smile at me. 

“That’s unfortunate. I liked it. It suited you.” Peter laughed and watched as I sipped my wine. 

“Did I wake you?” I knit my eyebrows together.

“How did you know I was sleeping?” I touched my mouth in fear of drool. Peter touched my cheek and my brain short-circuited as his finger traced my face. Rough skin on my soft skin, warm palms on my cool cheek.

“There’s an imprint.” 

“Oh.” Oh? How adequate. Idiot. I blushed and pulled away to sip more wine down quickly. Peter glanced up at the stars and smiled. He was handsome with the moonlight in his hair. His tunic was unlaced showing off some of his chest like when we first met. Before the Fae. I frowned looking up at the stars. “Where’s the dipper? Or Orion?” I could see Peter glancing at me from the corner of my eye as I spoke. I hadn't bothered to look at the stars since arriving, only the moon.

“Different universe.” I curled my leg under my body while closing my eyes, letting the calm wash over me, the buzz helping. A shiver passed through me as the hair on my arms stood up, the wind off the ocean cooling my warm face. I curled my legs up to my chest as the wind picked up. 

“Cold?” Peter whispered. I nodded, glancing over to him. I laid my head on my knees as we stared at each other. I felt a calm wash over me like I have never experienced with any infatuation before. I blushed as he brushed my cheek and stood. “Dance with me?” Happiness welled up in my soul.

“I don’t know how to do it properly, though.” I giggled. I took his hand as he engulfed me in his arms. 

“Quite alright. You can just stand on my feet.” I carefully stepped up, my bare feet on his leather boots, leaning into his chest. We danced for a while, myself warming up. I laid my head on his chest and felt his head on top of mine. I giggled as he pulled away to twirl me around and pull me back in. I glanced up at him from under my lashes and caught him staring at me. He smiled at me and I smiled back, enjoying the attention. His heart hammered against his chest, as did mine. Peter brought his face closer to mine, my body arching into his.

“High King! Your sister is on her way to find you.” Ditmos walked onto the balcony. I pulled away touching my burning neck. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I could not be caught with the High King. He needed to marry a princess or something. Not a General. I grabbed my cup and threw back the rest of the wine I shouldn’t place him in such a compromising situation. I closed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath to calm my racing heart before turning back to the King and his guard.

“Tell her I’m on my way back,” Peter spoke to Ditmos. I leaned against the small table, careful to not knock over the wine glasses and bottles on the table. I smiled politely at Peter as he rolled his eyes. 

“You should get going. Your people miss you.” I joked. The air grew thick as he walked closer to me, arms on either side of my waist. I felt my heart climb into my throat as his nose brushed against mine. I liked him. But, he was the high king who needs a lady as a wife. Was I willing to risk my new status and home and way of life for a mere kiss?

“I don’t care. There’s someone more important right now.” I bit my lip as my door slammed open. I sucked in a deep breath and dropped my eyes to my lap. No. I wouldn't sacrifice any part of our lives for some stupid kiss. 

“Peter Pevensie! Where have you been?” Susan’s voice carried and cut through the thick air around Peter and I, ruining our moment. Peter grabbed my glass and poured another cup for myself as Susan entered my balcony, smirking at my blushing face and burning neck and Peter’s closeness. I couldn’t bring myself to look at either of the siblings as Peter gently handed me my cup. I mumbled thanks as Peter turned to his sister. 

“I was on my way back. I was just saying my goodbyes, mum.” I could feel the annoyance roll off of him in massive waves. Susan put her hands on her hips and tilted her head. A soft oof slipped my lips as she began to chew Peter out. We listened quietly as she ranted about him being disrespectful to Lady Savannah and to the guests and how he had to uphold his kingly duties by being present. She then turned to me and lifted an eyebrow. 

“And you, Catalina. You are the Diana. I had guests tonight demand your presence and you were not there-”

“I thought these were optional!” I held up my hands, the wine almost spilling over the rim of my cup. "And I'm not the Diana!" I mumbled.

“Optional? Oh dear Aslan. No, they are not! I had to tell everyone that you were sick from traveling. Embarrassing!” I bit my tongue as the sass almost exploded from within myself. “Next time, you will come to my chambers and get ready with Lucy and I. And you two!” Susan finally took a breath. “No more after dark rendezvous.” My eyes bulged out of my head as she turned and left. 

“Holy crap,” I whispered as I chugged my wine. “That was embarrassing.” Peter nodded as he stood up. 

“Sorry about that. She can be a bit much.” Peter rubbed the back of his neck.

“Much doesn’t even begin to describe this,” I muttered before biting my lip as Peter quickly turned around. 

“Cata-” I held up my hand.

“Go. Your people need you.” Peter shook his head, lifting my hand and kissing the back of it. 

“You’re more than you think, Diana.” With that, he left me alone with the stars and the wine. 


	13. I Don't Like These Feelings

My white and yellow kitchen warmed me along with my Mexican fusion food. It wasn't Narnian cuisine, but it was missed by my palate. I sipped my water before taking another bite. I could feel Johanna's eyes on me as I swallowed. 

"This changed you." Johanna leaned back, crossing her arms. "Narnia, I mean. You're different."

_Of course she's different. She's Diana._

Aslan's voice permeated through my head. I smiled before looking at her.

"Johanna, that's the thing about Aslan. He's going to change us. But, it takes fire to change people." She nodded before smirking. 

"At least you had a King to fawn over you." The scoff left my throat before I could even manufacture a response. 

"We didn't get a long time together." I rolled my eyes before continuing. "Besides, it was stupid to think about loving him."

* * *

_ A bow sat heavy on my back as I stood in the throne room next to a beautiful woman. _

_ “Milady, you need to stop pacing.” My voice was different in timbre and my build was stronger. _

_ “Diana, you don’t understand. This is my husband.” I sighed and lightly smiled at her before taking a seat on the armrest of one of the thrones. I didn’t understand love and it’s infringements on the heart. Queen Helen jumped as the doors slammed open and Jadis sauntered into the room. I rolled my eyes before standing up and moving to be stationed at the bottom of the dias. _

_ “State your business, witch.” I crossed my arms. Jadis smiled at me before looking up at Helen. _

_ “I’m taking the throne.” She looked over to a minotaur who threw the head of King Frank on the floor. I could have vomited at the pale head, stained with reds and browns, but Helen was already doing that after screaming. I pulled out my bow and shot at Jadis who lifted her hand and froze the arrow before turning it around and killing Helen. I swore and tied up my skirts before pulling my blades out. I fought the minotaur before a sharp pain pierced my back. _

_ “You failed, Diana. Aslan’s daughter they say? Looks like a power-hungry child to me.” _

  
  


I opened my eyes, breathing heavily. Moonlight flooded my bedroom and the curtains blew in from the sea’s breeze. A neighboring light came from Peter’s room. He had to still be up and it was past midnight; he only did that if he was working on a side project. I slid off of my bed and grabbed my short summer robe and braided back my hair from my sticky neck and tied it off before heading to our shared balcony. The light illuminated his parlor where he was bent over his desk, shirtless with shoulders flexing and relaxing as he moved his pen. I was doing so good about stuffing my feelings, but moments like this lit me up like fire. I took a deep breath and shoved the odd feeling away for later and opened the door, Peter not faltering. A year and a half into my stay at Cair found myself a recognized advisor to the crown and harboring a deep secret on my feelings for the High King. Peter was my best friend and whenever either of us would contract a case of PTSD, we would go to each other. He cared for me as I did, however, it was just friendship for him. My feet pattered on the cold stone as I opened the glass french doors. His back was bare and hunched over the parchment on the wall to my left. I leaned in the frame and watched him.

“Nightmare?” Peter asked without turning from his paper. I felt a blush crawl up my neck.

“Something like that,” I moved over to him, taking his wine cup, and sniffed it before finishing it off. “Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that it’s past midnight.” I croaked out. He smiled with an ease that has always flowed between us.

“I’m finishing up this proposal for the Fae.” I hummed and wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned slightly on him to skim through the document. I hummed as I finished it.

“It’s good.” I buried my face in his messy hair and closed my eyes to see Jadis. I sharply inhaled and pulled away. Peter placed his hands over mine on his shoulders, keeping me to him. I dropped my eyes to the ground, a blush rising to my cheeks.

“What was your nightmare about?” He twisted slightly to look back at me.

“Nothing important,” I mumbled. Peter rolled his eyes at me and let go of my hands to place his quill in his ink jar and turned around.

“And here I thought you were a terrible liar.” A smirk graced his lovely lips. I kept my eyes from him as I picked at my thumbs. “Our walls are thin. I heard you screaming about Jadis.” His hands covered mine and soothed over my thumb. “What did she want?” I pulled away and walked over to the couch and sat with a pillow on my lap.

“It was just a dream about a Diana. A vision. I saw her murder Queen Helen- “

“The first?” I nodded at his question. 

“Queen Helen called me Diana and then Jadis killed her before killing me. She looked like me too.”

"She is you, stupid." Peter chuckled. "When are you going to accept that?" Peter looked at my eyes before following the curve of my face down to my neck and to my slight cleavage and bare legs.

"When Aslan comes back and fuckin' tells me." I sassed with a light smile on my face, obviously deflecting. Peter hummed while his eyes shot up my body in realization. He turned around and swiped a piece of paper before offering it to me. I took it, flipping it over to see my name in beautiful cursive. 

“That came from Faramir. I can send your reply with this in the morning.” I nodded, breaking the wax seal. “How often have you been having these kinds of dreams?” Peter turned to me as I opened the paper. 

“Off and on for the past month. It’s getting worse.” I skimmed through the letter. The Fae/Narnian alliance was strengthened after the Giant War thanks to our diplomat, Alke. This was the first letter addressed specifically to me.

_ General Catalina, _

_ Congratulations on your position as a General within the High King Peter’s army. I hope that the High King is more generous than my aunt ever was to you. She was a ruthless, vile, woman at her best. I am undoing years of suffering the Fae, and yourself, have endured at her hands. _

_ I can only ask for your forgiveness for the suffering that I have caused you. I know how bad your nightmares can get, and I pray to Aslan that he eases them for your sake. I know how fond you are of your sleep. _

_ In the month that we have not talked, we have settled an accord with the Giants and have begun the slow process of moving back home. Your Narnian ambassador, Alke, has been a great help and advisor as my people find peace with your people and the Giants. Through him, we have settled a trade agreement that we hope the High King Peter will agree upon. _

_ Please write back soon, _

_ King Faramir of the Fae _

I folded up the letter and took a spare ink pad and quill along with some parchment to write back. Peter’s blonde mop was bent over the trade agreement. Of course, I’d forgive him. I’ve had time to heal from the old Queen’s torture. I still carried the scars, but every warrior held scars. King Edmund had his on his stomach, King Peter had a long one on his leg, Queen Susan had her scars on her hips. Mine were on my chest. I didn’t mind. I sent my support for Alke and for Faramir’s work. I poured wax on the folded paper and slid around Peter’s body to snag his signet ring from his hand. His hands were much larger than mine and warmed up my chilled limbs. I tried not to look affected as he smirked up at me. Ignore it, girl. Get it together. I got the ring off and pressed it into the red wax, satisfied. 

“Do you mind if I crash on your couch? It’s easier to sleep with other people around.” I mumbled as I slipped the paper to the empty corner of his desk. Peter took my hand and squeezed it before I slid his ring back on. 

“You take the bed.” I shook my head. He was always so polite. He acted like I couldn't see the bags under his eyes after we shared a night together. He always slept on the floor or couch.

“You’re sleeping in the bed, dumbass. You'll actually sleep tonight.” Peter and I smiled at each other. His eyes were clear and blue, only touched by the exhaustion of the night and the weight of the crown. Catalina, get it together. I cleared my throat, frowning, and mumbled a “goodnight” before heading off to his bedroom. Not too long after, I felt him slip into the sheets and wrap his arms around my body, pulling me into dreamland.

_ “You’re too slow, child. Quicker hands.” A fawn circled me in a sandpit. _

_ “Tell her to watch her shoulders! She keeps dropping them!” I smirked at the feminine voice dancing in my ears. Sweat slid down my spine and temple. _

_ “You just told me that!” I laughed at the young mouse with a feathered cap watching in the ring. _

_ “At this rate, I’m going to pin you because you keep laughing!” The fawn smacked my arm. I grabbed it and danced under it, placing him in a full nelson. _

_ “Try me!” I laughed out. The fawn dropped from in front of me to under me and weaseled out of the hold, pinning me. _

_ “Diana!” A young lady in fine clothes ran up to me. I sobered up and knelt in front of a new Queen. “The King just fired the general. He found him conspiring with the rebels!” She took my hands and helped me up. “You’ve been nominated as the personal guard to the crown!” _

  
  


I stood over a map with Orieous, discussing possible home defense operations. Last night with the nightmare, I had moved to King Peter’s room. Only to have a bloody play-by-play of the first Diana’s life. I closed my eyes, rubbing my forehead. The dreams had escalated to be every night and became more surreal. I couldn’t do it much more. I was tired and yet every time I closed my eyes, it was a new Diana. I wished at night that I would quit dreaming. I kept waking up Peter so, I finally moved to the bloody floor where the sleep was just as traumatizing.

“Diana?” My eyes shot open and I looked at Orieous. His eyebrows were knit together. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing, I’m fine.” He could see right through me. He didn’t respond and I knew it was time to come clean. “Okay, I keep having nightmares of the past Diana. I couldn’t sleep.” The centaur nodded and glanced at the head of the table, Peter’s chair. I couldn’t help but miss him and his warmth. 

“The Diana’s not a myth, Catalina. She is a real person. Aslan’s chosen associate to protect the Kings and Queens of Narnia.”

“She didn’t do a very good job at it,” I mumbled. Orious sighed and crossed his arms. 

“Jadis was at the height of her power, nobody but Aslan was able to destroy her. You will always make mistakes. That’s how we grow.” He paused looking out the window, a smirk growing on his face. “Last night, we read the stars. Artemisia was back in the Snelthol constellation.” I sat on the table, swinging my legs.

“What does that mean?” I questioned. 

“Do you understand how the Diana works?” I pondered his question.

“It’s just a title. A folk tale.” I answered. His long hair shook with his head. 

“It’s not just a title, milady. The Diana is one woman, reincarnated. My ancestors say that one day she will be united into one Diana.” I cocked my head. “You’re not a long line of Dianas. You are the Diana. These dreams are just memories returning to you.” I nodded slowly. 

“So, what does Artemira being back in Snelthrol mean to the Diana?” The general smiled and glanced at the Kings entering. 

“It means that another prophecy is about to be fulfilled. We are quite blessed to witness Aslan, the fall of Jadis, and the unification of Diana.” The other lords filed into the room as I pulled myself together for our meeting. After the meeting, the High King and I were to join Susan in the ballroom. She needed to teach me how to dance. I poured myself some tea and sat down, ready for the upcoming meeting. The prophecy? I was told that it was lost with the Witch? And the unification of the Dianas? Did that mean that she, us, we, whatever, are the same? I spent most of my time thinking rather than listening. I knew Peter could tell I was off, he always knew. He kept looking at me funny. The Lord's muttering brought me out of my reverie.

“If she is of age, High King, then she should be married!” Lord Tumrick began to shout about Susan marrying a Telmar. I glanced at Peter from the corner of my eye and caught his eye. _ Don’t do it _. I shook my head and rolled my eyes. Tumrick’s voice made my headache worse. I was not in the mood to deal with the self-righteous lords. The few men sat around the table, including Orious and me. The High King sat on my right and the King Edmund across the table, to the right of the High King. Orious sat next to me. I took a sip of my tea before speaking.

“She deserves a say in who she marries, and boys, she has her whole life to get married-” Lord Tumrick glared at me as his buddy, Lord Farquaad laughed. 

“General Winchester, Aslan has provided you a life of work and chastity. Queen Susan on the other hand, her life is destined for making alliances via her marriage and children.” I narrowed my eyebrows and pressed my lips tight together.

“Lord Farquaad, I’m sure that you did not mean to disrespect my sister and General Winchester like that? Women are more than domestic pawns.” The High King leaned back in his chair, bored with the topic and ready to move on. Lord Farquaad bowed his head. 

“High King, perhaps removing the tariff you placed on their metals two years ago? They have been much better after that disastrous trip with King Edmund.” I offered. I rarely spoke in these meetings unless I had something really good to say. Edmund chuckled and sipped his water before speaking.

“Good idea. I can write that into effect by Tuesday.” I smiled lightly as we were dismissed. I took my time collecting my papers and organizing myself as everyone filed out, leaving Peter and I. My head throbbed and I was exhausted. 

“General, are you coming?” Peter placed his hands on my shoulders. I nodded and stood up, taking his offered arm. “Have you eaten today?” I nodded, head spinning. “Have you had any water?”

“Are you my mother?” I chuckled. It was endearing to watch him fret over me. I could feel my heart flutter and myself fall a little more into him. I knew better than to love him. He was the King. I was just the Diana. Peter gave me a small smile. 

“I’m sorry darling. I just worry.” I shook my head and the flutters away.

“It’s fine.” I paused and looked up at him, smiling lightly. Queen Susan approached us in the hallway, a smile growing on her face. “Oh no. I don’t like that look on her face.” I mumbled. I was loathing her dance lessons. It wasn't like anyone wanted to dance with me at these things anyway. My head hurt and my feet were heavy without putting myself through this torture.

“Neither do I. Time to make a run for it, perhaps?” Peter's breath sent shivers down my spine as he whispered in my ear. I shook my head at him, unsure of his plan. 

“We don’t have time for that.” Peter let go of my arm and glanced at Susan before looking to me.

“Peter Pevensie, I’d think twice!” Susan commented at his ornery expression as she neared. He was going to make a run for it. A smile broke out on my face as I laughed. 

“Come on!” Peter grabbed my hand, running off to the gardens. I squealed, running quickly to keep up with his long strides. Out the side door and past the garden, I held onto Peter’s hand as to not lose him. He drug us through the gravel and dirt to the apple orchard. A few gardeners chuckled at us, shaking their heads. I’m sure it was quite a sight to see the High King and his General sprinting from the palace. We swerved through the maze, Peter pulling me into the clearing next to a small brook. I let go of his hand and bent in half. Air was thick and my lungs pumped quickly to get oxygen into my bloodstream. 

“Remind me. To run more. In the morning exercises.” I heaved out. I closed my mouth and took a deep breath into my nose and exhaled slowly out of my mouth before standing up. 

“Weakling.” Peter joked as he plucked an apple, washed it off in the brook and offered it to me. I took it and bit into it as he grabbed another one for himself. The apples in Narnia were next to none. “Susan is stressed for the ball tonight. She thinks that she can get a marriage proposal out of one of their lords.” The diplomats from Archenland were set to arrive tonight for a ball. I was to make my first presentation at the ball for the Archenlanders. As a single lady with high status and favor of the Crown, I was supposedly in high demand for marrying. Supposedly. 

“Does she even know him?” Peter shrugged as he swallowed the apple, the muscles working quickly. Catalina, focus.

“They’ve been writing since before I met you. Susan likes him enough.” Peter responded. I could tell he didn’t approve. I would make my own judgment tonight. We finished our apples, throwing them on the ground before washing our hands. “I should teach you how to dance.” Peter took my hand. I had weaseled my way out of dancing every single ball. Susan had enough this time around, going on about me being an eligible young lady and respectable woman of the court.

“You and I both know that I will not be participating in anything but drinking. You know, the usual.” I joked. Peter rolled his eyes as he pulled me tight to his body. I bit my lip. I could not develop feelings for this man. Thunder cracked in the distance as the sky darkened. Neither of us cared as I learned quickly how to move, giving full control to Peter. I loved him dearly, but I couldn’t tell if it was just because of our friendship. He spun me around and pulled me in close, wrapping my arm around his neck. The first of the rain came quickly, drenching us slowly. It was like something out of a romance novel. I loved it deep down inside.

“I have a secret to tell you,” Peter leaned down and whispered in my ear. “I only like dancing with you.” Oh no. I closed my eyes, defeated, and rested my forehead on his chest. “You do know that you can be vulnerable with me, right?” Peter nudged my temple with his nose. I took a deep breath and looked up to him, brushing noses. Dear Aslan, we were so close. Blood rushed to my face and chest, my hands shaking. This was the High King of Narnia, so close to me. Not just some boy. If I fell for him, I would be the model for all wives and the mother of the crown prince or princess. I was barely fit to carry the title of Diana, much be the High Queen Catalina. My stomach dropped at the thought, blood dissolving and hands steadying. I blinked and steadied myself. 

“High King Peter,” 

“Stop that. Stop the bloody formalities, Catalina.” High King Peter froze and took a deep inhale. A bad feeling settled in my stomach. I pulled away from him, feeling exposed and completely helpless. I wrapped my arms around my waist and turned away from him. As much I could disappoint him, I was three times more disappointed with myself. “I don’t understand you sometimes.” He huffed. 

“You do know that I’m not it. I’m not yours to have.” I turned and crossed my arms. This was the moment of truth. “You need a queen. I'm not queen material, much less Diana material, and you know it. I'm everything your sisters are not.” 

“That’s ridiculous, Catalina-”

“High King! Diana! Word from the Fae!” A fawn came into the clearing with Mancha and Ditmos followed him. After Faramir’s letter to me, he and I had been conversing and building a strong friendship. He handed the High King a letter and myself a package. I thanked him and left promptly, leaving the high tensions. This was a great excuse and yet as I walked back to my room, I felt off. Something was wrong and I couldn't place my thumb on it.


	14. Funny You Mention It, I Do Hate This!

Queen Susan and Lucy helped me get ready for the ball, as they always did, placing me in a deep yellow gown. I didn’t say much, knowing that the sisters could read me like a book. My hair got curled and pinned to the top of my head with some makeup popping my eyes. I was stunning, but I only wanted to sleep. Susan sighed and put down a makeup brush and looked at Lucy before looking at me once more. I dreaded Susan's lectures and add Lucy in the mix? I was a dead woman walking. The silent conversations of the Pevensie siblings were the most silent and reliable form of secrets in Cair Paravel. I felt my blood run quicker as they looked to me.

“What’s going on? You have been moping all night.” Susan pressed. 

“Nothing is going on. Everything is fine. And I don't _mope_.” I stood up from the chair, dodging Lucy, and slipped on a pair of heels. “Thanks for the help. I’ll see y’all downstairs.” I rushed to the door, making a beeline to my room. I felt sick to my stomach and clammy. The package from Faramir sat on my table, beckoning me to it as I passed it on my table. What was inside of it? It could wait, I needed to head downstairs now. I paced for a minute, trying to let my brain catch up to my gut before I caved. I moved to the package and opened it up before lifting out the packaging. A gold circlet sat alone in the box with a note. Why would he send me something like this? My stomach dropped and churned. 

_ To the High Queen Catalina, _

How misinformed he could be. The paper crackled as I set it down and lifted up the crown to examine it, turning the precious metal to catch the light. “Aslan, I’ve gotten myself in deep this time,” I muttered. “I know you’re out there listening, but I could really use your guidance right now.” I kept turning the circle, admiring it. 

“Do you know how dearly loved you are, Catalina?” I jumped at Mancha’s voice. The silver woman moved next to me and sat down. “Aslan doesn’t abandon the Diana. You are precious and chosen in his eyes.” Mancha tilted her head watching me.

“What if he chose wrong? I can’t keep up this lie much longer.” _High Queen Catalina_. The title echoed in the back of my mind and I knew that it would for the rest of my life. Mancha nuzzled her muzzle into my shoulder, comforting me before standing up. 

“Put it on, Diana. It would be rude to refuse a gift from the Fae. It’s time. Let’s go.” I nodded and stood up, following her into the ballroom with my circlet fastened on my forehead.

* * *

The first thing I did was find some wine. I felt like the human embodiment of shit and needed something to ease the tension in my shoulders. Ladies circled the room in their gowns, gossiping and romancing while the men shook hands and talked politics. I stayed off to the side talking to Mancha and Orious as Mr. Tomas cleared his throat and announced the Kings and Queens. Peter entered first with Susan, a light gasp slipped from my lips at his bright gold attire, including his gold crown on his head. Susan was quite the matchmaker when she wanted to be. She had matched our outfits together. I rubbed the bridge of my nose as Orious cracked a smile. Why would they bloody do this? Everything just kept piling up. The Kings and Queens danced first and as they finished it, I was pushed forward by Matcha’s nose on my leg until I was on the edge of the crowd. Peter searched for a new partner as other women in pastels and whites pushed forward. I, on the other hand, sunk back into Mancha. He and I made eye contact, his eyes drifting up and down my body to take me in. I would not be phased by him tonight. I straightened out and tilted my chin up in defiance to his gaze. He passed me and picked some blonde who was everything I would never be, a Lady Savanna look alike. Mancha knitted her eyebrows as partners paired up and I left the floor to get more wine. The summer air on the balcony overlooking the ballroom cooled my sticky skin. My body buzzed with wine and sorrow. What was I expecting? He knew as well as I did that there was a better woman for the job out there. That’s all this was. A job. I huffed and leaned on the rail of the balcony. Soft ocean waves danced bellow. Was this all I had simmered this down to? A bloody job? 

“He’s a fool you know. Why don’t you tell him that you love him? He obviously loves you.” Lucy surprised me, causing me to jump. I relaxed and leaned against the rail to look at him. 

“He’s the High King. He deserves a King’s daughter. I’m far from that.” Lucy shook her head. 

“But, you’re the Diana?” She protested. A gust of wind flew through our hair, the smell of rain not too far off from us. 

“I don’t see what that has to do with anything, Lu,” I noted. My hands were cold and my heart and mind were tired of the fight. 

“Don’t you see?” She bounced on her toes and took my arm. “You’re Aslan’s daughter! The King above all kings is your father!” I bit my lip and looked out to the crowd. I wasn’t Aslan’s daughter, but it was a path to the High King’s heart. My body settled as my heart relaxed. A pull saying _go, go, go, _ ignited a fire in my soul. I pressed my lips together. Lucy pulled me back into the ballroom. “Go find him!” I bit my lip at her encouragement and pulled myself up taller. I could do this. I am the Diana and I would not be shaken or moved.

I looked through the pretty fabrics to find the blonde mop of hair and could not find it. He never left these things? Unless it was an emergency or with me, he never left. I moved out to the hallway and quickly moved through Cair to find him. I needed to do this now, or I would never be able to tell him that I loved him. Dread filled my gut. I caught Ditmos and Mancha on the staircase, intensely conversing in hushed tones. I passed them, Mancha calling my name. I held up my hand, needing to speak to Peter. I giddily turned the corner and froze. My smile fell from my lips as my body sunk, slamming the exuberant feeling out of consciousness. The rushing blood dissipated and left me light-headed as I watched the High King Peter make out with the blonde girl from earlier. He didn’t want me. Nobody wanted me. I was too scared, too rough, too proud, too emotionally incompetent. I was a lovesick fool. Breaths caught in my throat. This is why Ditmos and Mancha didn't want me to come up. I quietly walked past them to my room, trying my best to ignore his hushed tones and the sighs. I placed my hand on the door handle before a faint whisper danced on my ears. It was so quiet, I doubted even hearing it. My name slipping from Peter’s lips. I froze in front of my door, whipping around at the sound of his voice. He was still engrossed in that girl. A lovesick fool I was. I opened my door and slammed it shut, locking it. Darkness and jealous rage filled my body. I was a bloody idiot. I took off the circlet and threw it across the room, shattering some glass items. I kicked my shoes into the wall and stripped the outer layers to my corset and pants, leaving my hip pads and skirts on the floor. Nauseous and upset, I let my emotions take reign for once. Tears streamed down my face like the earlier rain. I just wanted to be fucking normal for once. To sleep without dreams, to not crush on a man like Peter, to not be the fucking Diana. I wanted to be normal and boring! I wanted to go home to my friends! 

_ I didn’t call you to pursue boring, child. _

Aslan? 

_ How dare you doubt me like this! My own daughter! How many prayers have I answered for you? Am I not enough? _

But I-

_ Silence! Be still and understand. _

I blinked and found myself next to Jadis and Aslan. The deep magic was being agreed upon and I was the one writing it down. It was peaceful next to the King. The traveling scribe's pad was solid in my lap as I learned from Aslan in the planes of the south. My stomach lurched sideways as I stood in armor to the first crowning of the King of Narnia. Pride, joy, and hope all accumulated together into a love for my people. I found friends who pushed me during training and battle planning, centaurs always guiding me. Orious’s great grandfather being born and befriending him, the rise of the neighboring countries, the rise of the witch. I gasped for air as the white noise in my ears grew, the scenes of all past Dianas merging into one, me. Blood rushed to my limbs and head, ready for a fight before it all stood still. I took a breath in, closing my eyes in the white light before my weight dropped straight down with my blood, forcing me to my knees. Little grains of the sand bit into my knees and sea air rushed into my nostrils with the waves calming me. The sand felt soft against the palms of my hands as my body shook with the aftereffects of what I bore witness to. The combination of my dreams and other visions made the complete story of the Diana, and yet I was still confused by it all. My hair whipped in the wind, salty seas comforting me.

“Do you know what this place is, Diana?” I jumped at Aslan’s voice before shaking my head. “It’s my land. Our home. The Diana isn’t my daughter. She’s the chosen woman picked to be my representative to the royals while in Narnia.” I nodded slowly, not really trusting my voice. “Each Diana is different, but her spirit is the same." The great lion sat next to me, my hair flying around my face from the wind. After weeks of stress, I was finally calm. I glanced up at Aslan, the weight of it all on my shoulders. He was soft and yet so strong and mighty.

"And what happens if I fail you?" I whispered. Aslan breathed on me, calming any worries I had. 

"You will not for I have created you to do this. You have been anointed by me. My chosen and precious daughter. The road from here on will become harsher than the one you come from. Lean into me and not your own understanding." Aslan smiled before standing. "It is time to go, child. Be strong." He paused, halfway to the giant wave before us, and glanced back at me. "Oh, and Diana, be vulnerable with Peter."

I blinked and sat on my knees in the middle of my room, shattered porcelain or glass stung my knees. A white gown with a plunging V-neck and an open back accentuated my body with an odd weight on my head. I gingerly touched the tiara on my head before wiping my face and standing. I lit a few candles to illuminate my room, the crinkling of parchment under my heel freezing my body. I shook out the match and picked up Faramir’s letter. Red dots marred the white parchment.

_ High Queen Catalina, _

_ I haven’t been fully honest with you, princess. I’ve been in conference with the High King Peter about you. I’m sure if I told this to you in person, I would receive an earful about how friends don’t talk about friends behind their backs. But, this is important. This is about the High King’s legacy and heirs to the throne. The survival of Narnia. _

_ As you know, the High King needs a wife. He is beyond the proper age to marry, and the line of succession is in question. He needs a woman as blessed by Aslan as he is. I can not think of such an equal. None but you, princess. _

_ He and I are in agreement that you should be the next in line if something were to happen to him. However, the only way to do that is through marriage. Marriage or a military coup. General Orious will not allow that. As of right now, the line of succession is empty and needs filling. The High King fears the power vacuum that could be. I’m pressuring him, along with his dear sisters and brother, to propose to you. _

_ High Queen Catalina, you are blessed by Aslan, not because you are the Diana, but because you are fiercely loved, protected, and inspired. Aslan has given you leadership, grace, and strength no other human could possess. He made you for such a time as this. He made you for the High King. And, for Narnia. _

_ I’m aware this might be hard to hear, but it’s the truth. You are one of the most honest people I’ve ever encountered, and that includes Alke. The High King Peter is madly in love with you, as you are him. It’s time to give in to your emotions, Catalina. It’s time to be vulnerable with him. Secure the throne, save Narnia. _

_If the High King harms you, he will have war with the Fae._

_ Your friend, _

_ King Faramir _

I closed the letter, crying once more. I felt like everything was just too late. I was too late to read Faramir’s letter. Too late to tell the King I loved him. Too late to be vulnerable with people. I had so much to prove, I had never left the defensive mode that the war forced me into. I had the fantastical shoes of the Diana to fill and I never let myself relax and let my guard down. I pulled out a piece of paper and my quill and wrote him back. It was time to change. I was Aslan’s anointed one. I am Diana. 

_ King Faramir, _

_ I am aware of the High King’s interests in myself. However, I caught him snogging another lady right outside my door. I must discuss with the Queens and King Edmund the creation of an emergency line of succession. I fear what might happen with the lords, for they do not care for me. Feel free to send your assassins for the High King. King Edmund and the girls can handle Narnia without him. _

_ Your friend, _

_ General _ _ Catalina Winchester _

_ The Diana _

I sealed the document and set it aside to give to the maids to take later. A soft knock came to my balcony door. Peter. I closed my eyes and stood up, back to him, walking towards my bathroom. My knees stung with every step. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I was an angel. The gathered fabric clung to my curves and gave way where it needed to, my skin glowed, and the tiara of diamonds sparkled in the dim light. The smell of the sea wafted into my bathroom, signaling the arrival of someone into my room. I grabbed a pair of tweezers and a small vial of alcohol and exited into my main room. I kept my eyes focused as I lounged next to the fire and slid up my skirts. I hissed as I picked out the glass bits. I could hear the shuffling of someone moving before Peter kneeled before me. He took the tweezers and took over for me, a hand resting on my knee, the other grasping the back of my thigh. I inhaled sharply, not used to being touched. 

“I’m sorry.” Peter’s breath danced along my leg, causing me to involuntary flex my thighs. 

“You’re just having fun. No problem. I’d just wish that next time you tell a lady that you like her, you don’t go snogging someone else that same day.” I hissed as Peter wiped my knee down. Peter shook his head, hair shaking under his crown.

“I was trying to distract myself.” Peter finished dotting my cuts before moving my skirts to the other leg. His hand danced on the bottom of my lace garter for a second before moving to my knee. A shiver danced down my spine. I would not let him move me just because he spoke sweet words and touched me.

“Distract yourself from what? The bloody ball?” I scoffed, tucking my hair behind my ear. 

“From the way you looked in that dress, love.” I felt my breath hitch as Peter locked eyes with me. His eyes were dark in the candlelight and his calloused skin was rough against my smooth legs. I could feel myself blush and I couldn’t help but press my lips together. 

“Careful Peter. That sounds like an excuse to me.” I mumbled. Peter narrowed his eyes as he leaned over me, arms on either side of my head. His nose brushed mine, sending jitters down to my hands. 

“It was terrible. Every time she kissed me, all I could think about was you.” His breath smelled like spiced wine but he was not drunk from that. 

“Did you say my name out there?” I questioned. My hands brush against his strong chest by accident, the shaking too much to hide anymore. 

“Do I make you nervous?” He smirked down at me, eyes dropping to my lips. I bit my lip as Peter licked his.

“I asked first, Peter.” I narrowed my eyes and buried my hands in my dress. Blood rushed to my head as his lips neared mine. I had to restrain my body from taking what she wanted. 

“Yes. Do I make you nervous?” I gasped as one of his arms moved and danced up my thigh and grasped the garter. His thick hands yanked my hips up and pressed into my core. 

“Yes!” I gasped and squirmed as his lips broke into a large smile. I let his hand tangle itself into my hair and pull me into a kiss. I gasped as my soft body met all of the hard contours of his own. It sent shivers down my spine as he worked me to relax. I pulled at his tunic, wanting it gone as his lips danced on my neck. 

“Pete! Open up!” Edmund pounded. I pulled at Peter’s tunic, groaning. I begged Peter to ignore it. Peter shook his head at me and bit my neck, a gasp slipped my lips as my eyes rolled shut. “Don’t encourage him, Catalina! Peter, open the door!” Edmund hollered again. “Or, I can just break down the door to your snogging session!” I rolled my eyes again before straightening myself out and opening my door. Edmund brushed past me before freezing at the warzone. I might have broken a bit more than I realized. “Should I ask? When did you change?”

“No, you shouldn’t. What’s so important that you interrupted us?” Peter shifted, annoyed and bored with his brother. Edmund smirked at Peter’s rumpled hair and shirt. 

“The white stag has been spotted in the North Woods.” I bit my lip and looked at Peter. If he got the stag, he could have anything granted to him. Anything for us. I turned in my chair, lounging against the armrest. 

“You four should go. See if you can wish for the prosperity of Narnia.” Edmund narrowed his eyes at my suggestion. 

“Four? I can do it alone. The girls will just slow me down!” Peter scoffed at his brother. 

“Tell that to them then. We will leave at dawn. Catalina, will you stay here and make sure everything runs smoothly?” I nodded to Peter. “That means our meetings too.” 

“I can do it, Peter.” Edmund snapped his head to me before a grin bust onto his face. 

“This will be fun. Good luck with the lords, sister!” Edmund called over his shoulder as he left us in the candlelight. Blood rushed to my neck at the title as I stared at the door. The rumpling of paper alerted me to Peter’s movements. He picked up Faramir’s letter and skimmed through it, a smirk coming to his lips.

“Should I prepare for war with the Fae?” His eyes drifted over to me, raking up my body. 

“I’ll have to write him a new letter, but I think we will have peace yet,” I replied. Peter placed the letter down and offered his hand to me. I stood up and entrusted my small hand in his large hand and let him pull me close. 

“Do you want the throne?” Peter knitted his eyebrows together.

“I'll take the throne if it means I get to have you. I just want you.” I burned with blood pumping to my face. Peter moved an arm under my knees and one behind my back, pulling a gasp from me. He lifted me up and carried me over to our balcony. I giggled as he set me down, the cool air of the night seeping into my dress. I shivered as Peter left to his room, whispering a 'wait here'. I glanced up at the stars with a feeling like this is right where I should be. Like the stars have aligned just for me. Perhaps that is what Orious spoke of yesterday. I shivered as the wind wrapped around my bare skin, cooling my flushed body.

"Here. You must be cold." Peter draped a blanket over my shoulders, kissing my head. My heart warmed as I relaxed into his hold before he let go of me to stand before me. "Would you become the High Queen for me?" I narrowed my eyes as he opened a black box to me. Inside the box was an intricate wedding band with twisting vines to hold a diamond. This was his marriage proposal. I gingerly touched it, looking at him, then looking at the ring.

“How long have you had this?” That was the only coherent thing I could get out of my mouth. Peter chuckled, sounding nervous for the first time in our short history together. I made him nervous. That thought alone fueled my ego. 

“Faramir wrote to me last month. It was, ah, very eye-opening.” I narrowed my eyes, leaning away from the box. “After that, I began the process of having it made. Made for you if you choose to accept it.” My nose scrunched up. "I know it is not very romantic, but time has a way to make things less romantic." He rambled on. 

“What did Faramir say?” Peter blushed at my question. I’ve never seen him blush like this before. It was endearing. 

“He said that if I didn’t propose to you within the year, he would have to marry you. That amongst other things.” Peter mumbled the last part. I hummed, content for the moment. 

“I’ll become the High Queen,” I whispered, looking into a pool of blue eyes. Peter broke into a relieved grin and took my hand to slip on the ring before dragging me into his room. I protested before he stopped me in his bathroom, looking in the floor-length mirror. I narrowed my eyes and crossed my arms. What was he up to? He motioned for me to turn around, grinning like a fool. I faced the mirror, tilting my head. Peter brushed a curl off of my neck and kissed the spot, eyes locked on my fluttering ones in the mirror. I pulled myself up tall. The weight of the crown was lighter than I expected it to be with the way he looked at me. 

“Stunning. The most beautiful woman in the world.” Peter’s words caused a flutter in my heart and my blood to pump quicker. I took his hands and wrapped them around my waist, leaning back into his hold. His nose buried itself in my hair as he took a deep breath. “If you caught the stag, what would you want?” Peter questioned me. I hummed, not quite sure how to answer him. 

“I don’t know. I would want to keep you and Narnia safe, ask for a prosperous reign, and ah,” I paused, mulling over how I should say it. “I would want my, our, firstborn to be a strong leader,” I whispered. As High Queen, my first and foremost duty would be to produce a healthy baby. To be the role model for all mothers and wives. 

“Our daughter will be a strong leader if she has you to look up to.” I blushed at his encouraging words as he placed his hands over my stomach. 

“It’ll be a boy, Peter.” I giggled out as Peter placed a soft kiss on my neck. His beard tickled along the way. 

“No. It will be a girl. I’ll ask the stag for a girl. A strong, sarcastic, elegant, little girl.” He brushed his lips over my ear. “A baby girl for the High Queen Catalina, the Diana.” I turned in his arms and kissed him hard, tangling my fingers in his hair. Peter groaned and dug his finger into my hips. I felt his fingers sliding down and around to grab my ass, my head breaking from the kiss to groan. Peter's lips drug down my throat to suck and bite and to lick. 

"Peter!" I whined. His lips smirked against my pulse point and his hands lifted me up. 

"What, princess?" He pushed his hips forward, moaning. I rolled my hips into his, hoping that I was near somewhere good for him. Fingers snaked into my hair and pulled hard.

"Bed?" I asked, breathy with a heaving chest. Peter pulled away to look at me with his bright blue eyes.

"Yes." 


	15. Fourteen years into this fic...

"You slept with him! Holy shit!" Johanna's screams were deafening in the small apartment. Her hair flew around her head as she jumped up and down quickly. Elizabeth simply rolled her eyes. They were happy for me. For the last year and a half, my friends were trying to get me laid. I also wanted to get laid, but I had not been attracted to anyone enough to try to sleep with them. 

"Was it any good?" Elizabeth smirked. Was he any good? Ha! My skin licked at a fire as I thought back to that night. 

"He was an absolute gentleman." I started. Johanna snatched my hand and pulled me off of my chair to yank me closer. 

"Okay, but I need details, lady! Was his d-" 

"You!" I cut her off to speak. "You need to listen to the rest of my story. We only had one night together. Everything after that was a shit show." I mumbled the last part. Elizabeth took a sip of her water before coming closer to me.

"You keep talking like something terrible happened. What could have happened?" Her voice was soft and comforting. My wretched soul shouldn't taint her holy one, but it was impossible not to keep the hell from the girls.

* * *

I slept hard, only stirring when Peter did in the early morning. I felt him pull away from me, kissing my forehead. I fluttered my eyes open slightly and blushed at how much skin I could see.

"Are you leaving already?" Peter nodded at my question and pulled on his pants and tunic before turning back to me. 

"Ed's about to break down our door. I'd figure it be best to prevent him from coming in." I giggled and pulled the sheets tighter around my chest, the cool air creating goosebumps. "I will see you tonight, love." Peter leaned over me and left me with a soft kiss. I thanked Aslan as we pulled away, breathing the same air.

"Don't forget to ask the stag for a healthy country," I mumbled as Peter covered my shoulders. Peter sniggered and kissed my forehead, lips leaving a trail of fire. My eyes fluttered shut as fire raced in my veins.

"I was going to ask for a baby girl, but I suppose that can be included in the fine print." I giggled as he kissed me again. Peter placed a soft kiss to my cheek before muttering his goodbyes and walking towards the door. I smiled at the door before sinking back into the warm sheets to seek out the last few hours of sleep. For once, my dreams left me warm and soothed like a broth for my sick soul.

* * *

* * *

"High Queen, it's time to wake up." Mancha nosed my hairline, pulling me awake. 

"I'm not the High Queen. Go find Peter." I grumbled, rolling over in my sheets. The sun was too bright to ignore and the scent was not the comforting lavender of my own room. Paper and wood mixed with the sea air surrounded me. Peter’s room.

"Get up Diana. Your people are waiting." I huffed and let her fling a dressing gown at me. "Have fun last night?” The silver wolf strode away from me as I got dressed. I slipped on the white gown muttering curses at the nosey woman and her off handed and quite passive question. Rude of her to even say such a thing. The mere thought of her knowing of last night left me burning. Mancha led our way out of the High King’s room and into mine, humming a Narnian song. Mr. Tomas used to play it for us on delightful spring days. I opened my door expecting carnage and seeing immaculate conditions. The maids never cleaned my room. I wanted to do it myself. Odd. Especially after my hysterics of last night, I needed to do it myself. "Did Peter make the maids clean my room?" I questioned. Mancha shook her head in front of me. 

"That was all of them. You and the High King were not as conspicuous as you think you are." I burned more at the thought of our activities being known to the staff. Would they treat me differently? I pulled on a light blue gown and restyled my hair in ringlets. I slipped on my shoes to see Mancha staring at me. She was waiting for me to do something. I narrowed my eyes for a second, staring blankly at her.

"What? Am I forgetting something? Oh! Peter's agreement with the Fae!" It needed to go out today and I had left it in Peter’s room in my rush to dress. I lead our way back into Peter's room to see Mr. Tomas standing there. I smiled at him and said good morning as I reached for the rolled parchment. 

"Did you know that I was the one who crowned the Kings and Queens with Aslan?" Mr. Tomas asked. I shook my head, placing the parchment in my right hand as Mr. Tomas picked up my crown. Peter and I left it on his night stand. He walked towards me and gestured to my head. What did he want to do? I could put the thing on myself? “May I?” The fawn beamed at me. His eyes projected pride and confidence. I stood like a bloody fish, gobsmacked. Did he mean to crown me? Mr. Tomas shook his head, silently chuckling, and reached over me to place the crown on my head. My eyes shut as I memorized the weight. Heavy and yet comforting, it was perfect. I lifted my head, pride coursing through my veins, my eyes opening slowly. Mr. Tomas and Mancha had bowed low. My people, my subjects, my friends.

“To High Queen Catalina, the divine.”


	16. The Whole Truth and Nothing but the Truth

The rest of the day went by in a whirlwind as I juggled my schedule and Peter’s schedule. I ran into the meeting room, late, to meet with Orious. I held pages and notes and maps as I pushed open the door with my hip and sat down with my papers, frazzled. 

“I’m sorry I’m late. No excuses, I-” I hit a cup of tea, spilling it all over my papers. I swore under my breath as I looked at my ruined notes. A hand covered mine, letting my body relax for the first time today. My eyes shut closed as a soft huff escaped my lips. 

“High Queen, take a moment.” Orious took both of my hands and bowed low before standing. “Sit down. Pour yourself a new cup of tea.” Orious cleaned up the spill as I sat my head in my hands. “Mr. Beaver told me that you were having a bad day.” He noted, tone without judgment. That was much welcomed. Many members of the court had looked at me with nothing but judgment today. It made me question everything I was doing from speaking to walking. 

“Not bad, just,” I paused looking for the word. “Difficult. Having to do everything without Peter and add my duties as the Diana? It’s overwhelming.” Orious nodded, sitting down. 

“Once you are officially High Queen to the people, you will have to name a new general.” I nodded, biting my lip. That could wait for another day. “For now, take this moment to breathe. All can wait until tomorrow.” I sipped my tea, the warm liquid buzzing and warming my body. A knock came from the door and a groan slipped through my lips. The meeting with the lords wasn’t supposed to happen for another fifteen minutes! Mr. Beaver stepped inside, frazzled and visibly upset with shaking hands and knitted eyebrows. I stood up, my body moving before I could think. Something was wrong. 

“My Queen, it’s not good.” Mr. Beaver paused, thinking. “It would be best if you saw for yourself.” The blood in my body rushed straight down into the floor, my stomach twisting. 

“Where’s Peter?” Mr. Beaver shook his head at my question.

“You need to talk to Phillip.” My body was out of the door and to the front lawn, sprinting to Philip. The saddles were still on the four returning horses and the Pevensie’s gifts from Santa sat in them. I could have vomited if it were not for the need for answers. Philip bowed slightly towards me as I approached him. 

“Phillip, what happened? Where’s Peter?” I touched Peter’s sword gently, hoping it wasn’t what I thought it was.

“We were close to the stag and I needed a break. I’m not as young as I once was. Queen Lucy found a lamp and wandered off. The High King followed her with the other two and they never came back. Ditmos tried following their scent and found nothing. They disappeared.”

_ I called them home to Spare Oom. _

Oh no, no, no. Aslan, this timing is terrible. Who would run the country? Me? The lords? 

I felt woozy as the reality set in. I needed friends to protect me. Allys. If I don’t make these alliances, Farquaad would have me expelled from court. My hearing rang as my legs gave up feeling. A cold rag pressed into my neck as a hand ushered me to sit down. Peter left me. He left me to go home. He used me, had his fill, and went on his way. I felt hot. My body burned. Why would he do this to me? I needed him and so did his country. I had no legitimate claim to the throne other than that I was the Diana and I screwed the High King. The people would call me a whore now. I trusted Peter and this is how he treats me? Mancha pressed her cold, wet, nose into my neck, shocking me away from my thoughts. I looked up to the Narnians who all looked to me. They needed leadership and I was the only one to do this. I took a few deep breaths and touched my crown. Who knows if I was made for such a time as this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a comment! Anything helps!


	17. A call for help

September 19

_ King Faramir, _

_ Narnia is in great trouble. The Pevensies left Narnia, back to Spare Oom. Alsan called them home. I hope they are happy. I don’t know why Aslan has sent them home. Hell nowadays, I don’t quite know what Aslan is up to. He is becoming more and more quiet. The Narnians are already dubbing this the dark times. I won’t let that happen, but without Aslan’s guidance, it's inevitable. Every day the lords become more miserable to work with. They don’t believe that Peter and I wed. They don’t believe that they went back to Spare Oom. Mr. Beaver has told me that they think that I killed them all. If the motive fits I suppose. I worry more and more and sleep less and less. I’m so lost. I don’t think you have the answers to my problems, nor do I expect you to. I just know you would be sympathetic towards me and my cause.  _

_ High Queen Catalina _


	18. A Responce

October 3

_ High Queen Diana, _

_ Your country is unstable and yet your people adore you. I have yet to meet a Narnian who doesn’t love you. The lords are only placing a fake stressor on you to test you. Get rid of them if you can! If you can’t, pay them no heed. Listen to the Beavers and Mr. Tomas. Listen to your generals and guards. They have never pointed you wrong. Keep talking to Aslan. He is always listening, even if he does not respond. If they ostracize you, come to me immediately. The Fae and the Giants recognize the authority of your reign and are prepared to defend it. Winter comes quickly. Make sure you can provide for your people. Winter always feels the longest, especially after the Witch, but your people are resilient, like their beautiful queen. I am eager to see you next month for my birthday celebrations. _

_ King Faramir _


	19. How It All Ended

Faramir’s words always warmed my wretched soul. I folded up the paper and wrote my own response. I couldn’t wait to see Faramir next month. I had been inside of Cair Paravel for too long. I needed out. I leaned forward in my chair in the conference room to look outside my window. Rain poured slowly down, tapping out light rhythms.

“High Queen Diana, the treasury is finished. The masons want you to review it before dinner.” Mr. Beaver spoke from my door frame. I asked for the treasury to be built long before the family left. I smiled and nodded to Mr. Beaver. 

“I should have a few seconds before the meal. What about the How? Has the construction begun yet?” Mr. Beaver nodded. “Good. I look forward to visiting them.” The lords filled inside the room, bowing to pay their respects before sitting. 

“Have your spies informed you about the unrest in the south? A village attacked another village last night.” Farquad announced, sneering. I glanced at Orious who tilted his head. No, I hadn’t. Interesting.

“Who told you that?” Orious responded, calm and collected.

“A family member,” He glared. “Are you going to pay them no heed? Diana, you must help them!” He shouted standing up. I jolted back before rolling my eyes at the dramatics of it all. 

“I will talk to my men. I need more information first.” I spoke evenly. It would be rash to do something before I knew all of the details. Even Orious had no idea as to what he was talking about. 

“Need more information?” He shouted. “Diana, your lethargic actions are killing your people!” A growl came from the back of my throat before I took a deep breath, calming my body.

“Misinformation kills people, I should know. My people were slaughtered because the crown didn’t look into the issue at the north mountain border. I will help, but I will not stick out my neck for snakes to bite.” I hissed. Orious nodded.

“Well said, my lady.” Orious nodded. “Well said.” I could feel my hands shaking and clutched my skirts. 

“Don’t be so easily fooled, Diana. You can’t be protected by the few when the many will revolt.” Not be fooled? Who did he think he was? I am the High Queen, anointed by Aslan! 

“I’m not the fool here, son. I am the High Queen Diana-”

“You’re a whore!” Tumrick interrupted. I revolted against the statement, my arms dropping and my body stepping away from the table. My eyes narrowed. How dare he insult me in this way! I rolled my shoulders back and took one more deep breath.

“You’re done. Pack your belongings. Go back to your families. You and Farquad are excused from the court for the remainder of the fiscal year. If you prove your loyalty to the crown during that time, I will welcome you back to Cair Paravel.” I seethed. “I think we are done today. Farquard, Tumrick, you will be gone by first light tomorrow.” I exited the room quickly and headed to my suite to organize a trip to the village the next morning.

* * *

The carnage was terrible. The small-government building was burnt down and the blood ran down the cobblestone streets. Women sat on their knees, the rough brick biting into their skin and fur, scrubbing the stain left. Sobs echoed in the standing doorways. 

"The High Queen!” A young colt bounded up to me, bowing. The women snapped their heads towards me, glaring. 

“Do not talk to her! She’s corrupted Narnia! She did this!” A young mother yelled at her colt. He backed off quickly. I dismounted my horse and looked at the woman. 

“Did I do this? No! I did not send my troops in to kill your people like dumb animals.” I snarled. Someone had slaughtered the village and it’s leaders and said it was my doing. I had not done such a thing. I loved my people too much.

“Then who did it?” A woman threw down her scrub brush into her bucket of water, the pink splashing from the displacement. “They wore Narnian royal crests and carried army regulated weapons!” I looked to Orious who shook his head. They needed answers and we had none. I did the best I could. Promise them hope and validation. 

“I will avenge your losses and,” The women looked in horror behind me, forcing us to turn and look. A small group of ten men in hoods and Narnian armor rode hard and fast at us from the tree line. Oh shit. They were so close already. I lifted my bow off of my back, but it was too late. A man lifted his spear and threw it at Ditmos. I moved. I reacted. No thinking. Who had the time? The spear was blocked. By my stomach. Orious called my name. Women screamed. My body collapsed on impact. Blood oozed into my tunic. People were shouting, yelling. Then, they spoke softly like angels. I closed my eyes in pain as someone tugged off my signet ring. The eyes of Farquad staring down at me.

* * *

I lifted my eyes, a scream tearing from my lips. My body was sitting in my bed on Earth. I clutched my stomach, hands coming away clean. I was in my grey sweatshirt with leggings. What the hell is going on? The door barged open with Joanna on the other side. I jumped and clutched my chest.

"Are you okay? What's going on?" Joanna still had her brassy long hair, but it was tied up in a messy bun. Her alumni shirt hung loosely around her curvy frame with her glasses on her head.

"Where am I? What happened? What day is it? How did I get here?" I had so many things that needed answers. I needed to get back to the Narnians. Who else was going to protect them?

"Whoa girl, deep breaths," The brunette sat down next to me, taking my hand. "You're back home. We went out last night and you got plastered. We got you home and changed you." Did we go out? It's been five years since I turned 20. Yet, my hands were just as callous as they were when I left Narnia. I gasped and stood up, pacing. I had to go back home. They would all die soon if I didn't.

"What's going on?" Elizabeth poked her head in the room, squinting at the light. "Catalina?" I froze, staring at her. It had been so long since someone had called me that. I had let down so many people. I felt her place her small hand on my shoulder before taking my hand. She was still the meek girl I had left. Meek, but kind.

"I had the most surreal dream, you wouldn't believe it," I whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You made it to the end! Congrats! I hope you enjoyed the fic. There is a part two, go check it out! As always, please leave a comment or kudos if you liked the story or if you have any suggestions!


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